Reflection &Amp; Learning

I came to this site for the first time because I was a cheating husband whose wife turned the tables and got even by doing the same. My cheating was all about sex. More sex, better sex, exciting sex with a drop dead gorgeous chick. But once my wife discovered the affair, I realized this new woman was nothing more than a wind up Barbie doll and expected that my wife and I could just get back into our marriage. My wife however was beyond hurt and devastated. She cried, she was angry, she couldn't eat, sleep, breathe or barely exist. She was often listless and lifeless trying to tell me what the affair did to her. I did feel somewhat bad but laying the cards on the table, I did think she was over dramatizing things and carrying on too long. My patience was wearing thin and I think I told her it was time to move on. And move on she did into the arms of another man. Only then did I realize what I had done to my sweet wife or so I thought.

Last week I spent 24 hours a day for ten days by my father's hospital bedside. He had fallen ill and rapidly went downhill. Within two days he was laboring for every breath listless and lifeless. I sat for days watching him in pain and the life drain out of him as he tried to communicate and could not. It was those days that it finally hit me like a ton of bricks. What I watched with my dad was the same pain my wife went through. The pain I inflicted on her and often dismissed as over played out. I would give anything to have my dad back as I would give anything to have never hurt my wife like that. My heart is broken and it feels like it won't heal just as her did. This beautiful woman deeply more beautiful than the barbie doll, sat with me as my dad slipped from life. I wrote this piece and read it to her and she cried and then spell corrected! I hope to never cause any person that much pain ever again and will find a way, any way she wants to cherish her for the rest of her life. And thanks to my dad who taught me yet one last lesson.
nicwag nicwag
46-50, M
1 Response May 16, 2013

great story nic, very insightful. Your wife will be a lucky woman that you can finally see how badly she was hurting.