To Sleep

I guess I was getting a bit desperate. I didn't sleep well, on most of the nights not at all, and I still had to study as hard as possible five days a week. I wonder if I had gotten an actual sleeping medication if I asked for it? Maybe, maybe not. I live in a small town, where doctors available mostly through public health care and are paid poorly. According to my experience only way to get some sort of prescription out of them is tell what is wrong with you and what medication you need. Overreacting is essential as well, any hint that you whatever is going on won't completely ruin your life and your dismissed.

I got my sleeping meds later, even if I don't take them in regular basis nowadays. But I'm rambling, back to the point.

I was minor when I started and didn't want my parents to know I had sleeping problems. I bought painkillers from the local apothecary, nothing that would need a prescription, normal ibuprofen. If I took ten or more pills at once and swallowed them with alcohol I could get a decent night of sleep. I did that few times a week, and one package would last about a month. I visited a few different apothecaries, and the no one saw anything suspicious,

I kept the ritual on about a half year before my parents noticed that I didn't sleep every night. They questioned me about it, and I admitted that I had been getting too little sleep, but never how I get to the sleep on those nights I slept.

Apparently my mother had had a bit similar problem long ago, and she had gotten medicine for it. For some reason that I don't know, she had stopped taking those meds (I guess she became better? Nowadays she isn't taking anything). She had lots of her old meds left, and she gave them to me. I was relieved, it didn't feel as dangerous.

I have been better lately, and even if I still occasionally have problems sleeping they are not bad enough to need pills. Nowadays I mainly use them after a long vacation or similar period when my rhythm has gone out of hands. Lazy *****.
Fearofsilence Fearofsilence
18-21, F
Aug 11, 2010