Like A Phoenix I'm Immortal

I have absolutely zero tolerance for people my age. It's not that they're not nice; they are. I just have no patience with them. I think about things that they would never dram of. I pass them in the halls, and hear them talking about things like who said what to whom at the mall on Friday night. My response: who cares?

I like to sit and ponder the stars. I think about eternity, the meaning of things, and whether or not we have more than one life (my conclusion, by the way, is that we have ten, each one as a different being, and then we take on the form of something not spirit-like, but not alive either - ghostly, but insubstantial). I smile at the thought of soul mates, which I never gave much thought to until my friend encountered hers, and then I became obsessed with the idea. I like writing about all of this, too. My favorite word is ethereal because it describes what I envision our souls to be.

The time I take to write these things is ridiculous, but it's what I do best. I have never shown them to anyone, because I'm afraid of a response. I'm not afraid of criticism; I'm afraid of praise. What I write wasn't meant to be praised or criticized; it was just meant to be. One time, a friend of mine asked me why I wrote about things that no one would ever understand. I had no response to give her. But I do have some opinions.

Some things just weren't meant to be understood. They were just meant to be. Like some questions weren't meant to be answered, or even to be asked, but just to drift out there in the void, existent, but unused, simply a part of everything. Sometimes I write the truth, partly because the truth is necessary and also because everyone else is just too much of a wussy to do it. The truth is eternal, endless, unfathomable, and that is why we should investigate it. What I wrote was a question, not asked of anyone or anything, but asked because I wondered. It was a question, though not in question form, and I shall be forever waiting to receive an answer. I know this because there is no answer. But there doesn't have to be. I just want to know.

I like eternity. It is a comforting thought, though one too deep to fathom. It tells me that no matter how much we lose, there will always be something to gain. Eternity is the one thing that can be blindly, unquestioningly depended upon. When all else has disappeared, forever will still be.

I apologize for the philosophic rant. You all probably have much better to do than to listen to the questions and pondering of a thirteen year old girl. No one else listens to me, so why should you? I'm not looking for a response to this; I just want to throw it out into the void, but you can comment if you like. Somehow, though, I doubt that anyone else in the world has these questions. Why should they? Perhaps I'm just another one of those rambling philosophers that nobody listens to. But maybe that's a good thing. If no one else will listen, then they will not know. And if they do not know, then they cannot disagree. After all, how can you disagree with something that does not exist? Once again, I apologize. My mother once told me that I am an old soul trapped inside a young person's body. Sometimes I wonder who stuck their stupid soul into me.

Or whose body I'm trapped inside.
MegaMonsterCheetahExplosion MegaMonsterCheetahExplosion
13-15, F
1 Response May 23, 2012

Omg I LOVE ur thinking about souls and bodies and stuff. I just love thinking about those things...it makes me really ponder about life haha and I really dislike being praised for things like that...to me, I think that everyone should be thinking about these types of things, as if it is a part of life. After all, we don't praise people for knowing what happened with who at the mall!! And this is just on the topic of life and stuff: I like the way you came up with the 10 lives thingy. In my opinion, I think that we are all spirits using a body, and that our bodies will die, but our spirits won't. I loved reading ur story and knowing that there are still people like that living in this generation :)