I Ahoy Davey Jones
I am being a criminal, stealing wi-fi from a fat company. Yeah, I know, its floating from their company being wi-fi'd.
I was going to go to your page, just to have someone to talk to, but I thought it would be burdening you, but I so need someone to talk to.
It is becoming more evident everyday, that not only will I not have a home, it doesn't look like I will ever . . .
The pain is so great, there is no one to say they love me... not like a friend...you know what I mean...and it hurts so so much.
Maybe it hurts more because of the proximity of Valentines' Day.
Or some of the hurt comes from telling my daughter, I was hoping to have more from her...one sentence, saying I don't have a computer so I can't be on the one at work long...then to see via facebook, she had been on there for three hours...no time for me.....I told her I had wished to be a part of her life with her kids...everyone else seems to...even her half sister knows her children and I, their Grandmother, does not..........not worth, the time, the effort.
So if even flesh of my flesh does not think so, and that puts her in the company of her sister........why should I believe The World would give a damn.
And for the record, It doesn't.
Except that I work for a really nice lady, in a decent job (there ARE worse), I see no reason to draw another breath.............
and quite frankly, if I was not a coward, I wouldn't.
Matey, it wont get better, I have tried every avenue, to no avail. Everyone else seems to fall into sh!t and win the lottery and smelling like Orchids.........and without even trying.
I try so hard to make things right, to make things work....and it is like I am a really B A D person...for evil prevails in my life....
Let Satan have this Dance, I'm done.
I was going to go to your page, just to have someone to talk to, but I thought it would be burdening you, but I so need someone to talk to.
It is becoming more evident everyday, that not only will I not have a home, it doesn't look like I will ever . . .
The pain is so great, there is no one to say they love me... not like a friend...you know what I mean...and it hurts so so much.
Maybe it hurts more because of the proximity of Valentines' Day.
Or some of the hurt comes from telling my daughter, I was hoping to have more from her...one sentence, saying I don't have a computer so I can't be on the one at work long...then to see via facebook, she had been on there for three hours...no time for me.....I told her I had wished to be a part of her life with her kids...everyone else seems to...even her half sister knows her children and I, their Grandmother, does not..........not worth, the time, the effort.
So if even flesh of my flesh does not think so, and that puts her in the company of her sister........why should I believe The World would give a damn.
And for the record, It doesn't.
Except that I work for a really nice lady, in a decent job (there ARE worse), I see no reason to draw another breath.............
and quite frankly, if I was not a coward, I wouldn't.
Matey, it wont get better, I have tried every avenue, to no avail. Everyone else seems to fall into sh!t and win the lottery and smelling like Orchids.........and without even trying.
I try so hard to make things right, to make things work....and it is like I am a really B A D person...for evil prevails in my life....
Let Satan have this Dance, I'm done.
By:
cheysghost
Age:
56-60
,
Female
