I have several friends right now going through divorce because of cheating spouses.  cheating is so distructive these people have destroyed their families and their relationships with their kids.  In all the cases the kids now want nothing to do with the cheating parents.  They have brought on stress to these middle school aged kids with infidelity with a neighbor.  It blows my mind how incredibly selfish and cowardly this one act can be.  I have never been married, I would like to be married one day but it makes me skeptical to get into a relationship with anyone when I see how selfish people are.  I try to treat people the way I want to be treated so I hope that I find a like minded person who will hopefully be less likely to cheat. 

How can you love someone and be so deceptive?   
likeliness likeliness
41-45, F
1 Response Mar 20, 2012

<3...likeness...<3 I can certainly agree and understand your viewpoint on this...I hear your scepticism and it is NOT unfounded. I think that there are LESS people who hold to the marriage vows than ever before and our media and TV supports "hooking up", "friends with benefits", etc like it is NO big deal to have sex with just anyone...I am so sorry that so many of your friends have CHOSEN to disrespect themselves and their spouses AND misrepresent what I believe is a wonderful relationship; marriage.<br />
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I have NOT had a lover/husband cheat on me. I have not cheated or even hinted at cheating on my two ex husbands and my current/third/last husband, I can't even understand WHY anyone would do that to someone whom they claim to love. It is a DEAL BREAKER of all deal breakers to me. <br />
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I am learning about borderline personality disorder and in MOST not all cases, the fear of intimacy and abandonment create a push-me=pull-you sort of drama that seems to invite infidelity. IF you plan on dating, I would get acquainted with the "ways and characteristics" of these emotionally ill/disabled persons (they are usually VERY intelligent and have history of past abuse toward them.) Check out outofthefog.net and bpdfamily.com for lots of good information about HOW TO DETECT this in a person...good luck to you hon.

Interesting, I will have to look into to those. It would be nice to see it coming and get out of the way before it hits! :)