My Life Has Changed Forever

I never had any allergies until I was in my late teens and since then have develop numerous ones, some more severe than others. The worst so far has been to airborne molds for which I have to carry emergency puffers in case of contact and almonds for which I have an epipen, at least they were up until Tuesday, December 20, 2011 This is the day I almost died from an anaphylactic reaction. I had no previous symptoms of any illness, I was feeling fine and went to work as per normal. The morning was normal and I worked away at my job and then a little before noon I decided to have something to eat. I had brought an apple Cinnamon pita with me from home and took a couple of bites; although I didn't see anything, I could taste mold and within minutes my symptoms started. I started coughing and hacking and couldn't stop. I went for my puffers and took a dose from each. Nothing happened I kept coughing and started getting a itchy rash all over. I took another dose of each puffer, but kept getting worse and then my throat started to close off. I began to panic because I was wheezing and could barely even take a breath. My hands began to shake and my extremities were tingling. I was feeling dizzy and so scared. I had never had to use my epipen before, but, knew that I didn't have a choice. I gave it to a lady I work with and she injected me. In the meantime, my boss had called the ambulance and they were on the way. The effects of the Epinephrine began to kick in which scared me even more because I did not know what to expect from taking it. My heart began to race, my blood pressure was soaring, I became cold and my hands were going numb and shaking so bad I couldn't hold anything, but within minutes I was able to start breathing without gasping.  By the time the ambulance got there, which was only minutes,  the epinephrine had started to work although I was still wheezing so they put me on oxygen which also started to help. they hooked me up to all the monitors to get readings of my vital signs, which were absolutely soaring. I was then loaded into the ambulance and transported to the hospital. I was amazed at how fast I was treated at the hospital. As soon as I got there, the paramedics gave my information to the triage nurse and I was brought right in, hooked up to all of their monitors, an Intravenous line was put in my hand and the doctor was right there getting the information and ordering IV drugs, which were started right away. The doctor explained to me and my husband who had arrived at the hospital by this time, that anaphylaxis requires immediate critical care, treatment and monitoring because so many things can go wrong in such a short period of time. The doctor also warned that I had to be monitored due to the possibility of relapse. My throat was still so swollen that speaking was difficult,one word at at time and very raspy. They kept me there under observation in the critical care unit for the afternoon and gave me a bunch of IV drugs. After I had been there for hours and was feeling very doped up from all the drugs the doctor , who had been in and out checking on me, came in again and said that I was well enough to be released but I had to keep on meds for the next couple of days because a relapse was still possible. I also had to get a new epipen before I went home.
This whole time I was so scared, I just wanted someone to hold and comfort me but my husband had left after only being there for a few minutes. I do not have a great marriage and haven't since he had an affair 6 years ago, but, he tells me everyday that he loves me and doesn't know what he would do without me. Well he almost found out what he would do without me and instead of being there for me and showing me that he loves me, he left me sitting there, scared. Then when he came and picked me up he was almost scolding me for not leaving the keys for my vehicle at work so he could have picked it up. It was also the night of my daughters Christmas concert at school and on the way home from the hospital after me almost dying, he tells me that I can take our daughter to her concert and he would go and get my truck. I informed him that the doctor had told to me to go home and just rest because i had been through alot and been given alot of medicine. He then agreed to take her to the concert and then go and get the vehicle but with the attitude like I was inconveniencing him. He never ceases to amaze and confound me with his selfishness. 
So here I sit two days after almost dying with the feeling of having an axe hanging above my head ready to chop down at any minute and no one to stop the blow. I am so scared now, having almost died and knowing that it could happen again anytime. I need so badly for someone to hold and comfort me; alleviate my fears and make me feel protected but, there is no one. Who do I turn to if it happens again?
mountsilky mountsilky
46-50, F
4 Responses Dec 23, 2011

What an ***. Happy you are still with us.

What a tool.

I read this and i really think you are verry strong...... know that we are here even if we dont know you i hope there is someone near by you can turn to i really do ..... ..... or if you are not scared of dogs i would recomend one , they fearsly love their oners and are the most loyal companions i know the Rough Collie is considerd one of the most loyal and loving dogs.

Thank you I have been getting great support from my friends here and I actually already have 3 dogs. I appreciate your taking the time to comment on my story.

Oh wow this is awful!!....your husband is very selfish! you have family members/parents/friends nearby that you can talk to?<br />
Hugs to you...........PIP

I really appreciate your concern and yes,unfortunately, he is very selfish which he has proven over and over again. I have family nearby by but, not that I can really talk to about this because they do not handle crisis well. I am talking to a friend here on EP who is very reassuring and is helping me immensely to work through my feelings.