Antidepressants Almost Ruined Me Life

About 3 year ago I got a new doctor. I went to him origanally because I was having trouble sleeping. I was giving trazadone but that didn't work so the doctor have me a script for celexa. I knew right then and there it was a bad idea but I took it anyway. At first the meds seemed to be great I felt more social and happy. Then a month later te doctor told me I had add and prescribed me to adderall. Then I turned into super women. I stareted a cleaning business. Worked all the time. But then the adderall started to not feel as good so my dose keeps going up along with the antidepressant.

I started drinking a lot smoking weed taking xanex(I was not perscribed to this) I started going out all the time throwing dinner life was my social life. I didn't think anything of it at the time but I started having angry outbursts in public or at home. If anyone said anything I me about it I became defensive and always justified my outbursts. I was in a very bad relationship at the time that I suddenly ended after 8 years. This is probably the only good thing that came out of this.

This is when things started to all go wrong. I moved in with a friend with our her dogs and my too wich was crazy in its own. I just drank my life away and continued taking all my pills. I felt something wasn't right so I called the doctor and they upped my dose to celexa.

This is when I became hypo manic.... I dot remember much from this time or I guess I try not to remember. I remember standing in my bathroom and saying to myself you are losing it. I called my doctor they told me to stop taking my pills and I completely lost it. I had withdrawal and was totally crazy. Then my doctor sent my to a phycologist and he told me I wha bipolar.... But really I was all outta sorts from going cold turkey all these pills.

Then I went through ups and downs with different medications each one just made me insane. I thought I was a psychic I thought I was on some kind of spiritual journey on the bipolar meds. I was hallucinating.

I had had it... I tol the doctor the pills he gave my made me want to jump of a bridge and I wasn't taking them anymore. He told me I was a hazard k society and I would never be ok without medication. I never took another pill after this day.

I continued to see my therapist weekly then monthly. She said she had never seen anything like my recovery she was amazed.

For a year or so after this I admitt I was depressed but I knew i was just in recovery and I vowed no matter how bad it got I would never take another pill. I had extreme remorse for what i had done and what i put my family and friends through.Slowly but surely I regained my self confidence and became happy again. I am now happy and healthy as I've ever been.

I am lucky that I am alive. I am lucky I still have a job. I am lucky I sti have friends after all that. Pplease think twice before taking these pills it was only about 8 months out of my life but it could have been fatal.
Cmcgix87 Cmcgix87
1 Response Mar 23, 2012

thats a cool story <br />
i have many pills that i dont take <br />
i just dont trust whats in them <br />
and im no doc