The Jury From Within

I am not good at drinking.. but i can't say no to an old friend who is hurting. I have stopped smoking, but today that ardent desire won't let me go. I was ecstatic when my high school friend showed up, finally somebody visited me in this exile. We smoked and drank and laughed like the good old days. She left ten minutes ago, and I don't feel sleepy at all.

The fact that i can still type this here means I am not very drunk. Yes i am a little bit tipsy, I can feel that burning sensation in my heart.

I am not here to act pathetic or to get anyone's attention. I just.. I feel like typing..

Everyone has their fair share of pain and struggle. The most difficult part would always be admitting our flaws and weaknesses. To admit is one thing, to accept is another story. People will never run out of confessions and realizations. Truth is, as we go through the process of unfolding our fates, we discover more of our personal pros and cons.

At this point I am to face the jury from within. I'm gonna have to face a verdict. My mind is the defendant, my heart is the accused. Yes I go through this trial every once in a while. I have my own utopia within. I protect the peace that I have inside, the peace that I have worked so hard to acquire. There is a constant battle between the two, they both contain strong points and both are equally deceiving.

The case for today, cowardice. Mind is accusing the heart for having unauthorized activities that may threaten the safety and welfare of its beloved utopia.

In the previous trials that i have attended, the jury would always come up with a unanimous decision - heart pleads guilty, mind happily goes home with its victory. So far, I am able to retain that peace within.

Today, it is a tough battle. My mind is shouting about its rules and rights, it is so brilliant in stating its facts, explaining logic, and setting examples of cause and effect scenarios. My heart on the other hand would stand firm on wanting to take extra measures to progress. It would shout its burning desire for affection. It would complain about not having enough activities, it desires to beat faster. It promises to make my utopia a brighter and more colorful place to live in.

Now the jury is having a tough time. The chief coroner is requesting to postpone the trial, he wants to investigate more. The judge then grants him his request. The trial will be postponed and the next date is yet to be determined.

I guess this is gonna be a long battle. I am too tired now to even guess about the end result. This is a rare case, it seldom happens that things don't get settled in an instant.

Let me study this more carefully when I'm more sane.

Hearing adjourned... till then.

dreamingtofly dreamingtofly
22-25, F
1 Response Sep 14, 2012

this is just so great to read,funny serious,i hope your verdict comes soon:)

thanks danman75, glad you felt the irony... hehe. Will probably write a sequel when I get subpoenaed again by the court. :)