Always Me

I've always been to blame for everything as far back as I can remember. When my mum was pregnant with me my grandmother had a stroke and that was when it all started. Everything that's ever gone wrong , I've been the only common factor. All my friends have ended up wanting nothing to do with me, my brother has schizophrenia, my mother is constantly stressed out about me as are my sisters. I've been diagnosed with depression and told my family but now feel like I have to pretend I'm better so they don't have to worry. The truth is that I've realised that everyone would be much better off if I was never born. My boyfriend never would have lost his job, my friends wouldn't have to listen to me , my family would be much less stressed and a lot happier. I've started cutting again and I can't stop every time I eat I cut, every time I smile I cut, every time anyone tells me they care I cut because I know I'll only cause them hurt at some point.....
Givenupallhope Givenupallhope
18-21, F
1 Response Nov 28, 2012

im going through the same thing!! i cut a whole bunch tonight:/ if you ever want to talk i have an open ear:)