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Me, Too!

I think I spend more mental energy comparing myself to other people than I do on anything else.

I hate that I am so petty and jealous of my friends that have more money than I do. Or are thinner than I am. Or prettier. Or seem to be happier than I am. I don't want to invite people to my house because it's not nice enough. Or clean enough. The list goes on forever. So I wind up pushing everyone away and being depressed because I'm so lonely.

Rationally, I tell myself that they probably have the same insecurities, and that things aren't always as they seem. I try to remind myself that money isn't what I'm about - that's why I've stayed home with my kids all these years. And honestly, I don't mind the sacrifices. But sometimes that jealous little side of me takes control.

My husband and kids and the few friends I have are great about trying to reinforce all the good things about me. But why is it so much easier to believe the bad?

Peace.

chelle523 chelle523 41-45, F Oct 1, 2008

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