I Say and Do Stupid/embarassing/hurtful Things I Regret
I dread going to social events because often I get this 'high' (whether I drink or not) and do and say stupid things, which I think are funny/clever/relevant at the time but when I wake next day - POW! The embarassment/self hate when I realise they were hurtful/stupid/embarrasing or over-opinionated things to do or say. I then spend days going around being miserable while I think of what I did. I know noone likes me because of this. My husband just laughs and says it doesn't matter but inside I am dying and want to run away. When I see the people again I have to act even more 'life and soul' to kind of make it go away, as if I don't care, so it's a vicious circle. The only other option is to sit quietly in the corner (because I can't do small talk) and then people ask me what's wrong. I would be better off never mixing with other peope as I am quite incapable of doing it properly. I must never have leaarned to socialise properly.