Does Love Like This Really Exist?

About two weeks ago, I got an e-mail. "I'm getting deployed and I want to see you." I had just gotten out of one of the worst relationships I had ever imagined (which went on for two years), and something in my brain told me to call. I called my soldier and he told me to find a plane ticket and he would get me there (where he was stationed.)
To understand the craziness of this you have to know about how we knew each other before this.
He was my first boyfriend, I was 16 and innocent and he just stole my heart away. We were together for about a year and a half.
He broke up with me, he liked another girl and I found out about it so needless to say it completely broke my heart.
He's been with other people within the 5 years since we've seen each other, and so have I, but he still e-mailed me constantly and was trying to get a hold of me for about a year now (which I ignored, because at the time I was in a relationship and I am not a cheater or liar. So I finally get the nerve to call him and before I know it I'm on a plane to another state! He proclaimed his love for me and told me that he never felt the way he felt about me with anyone else. (sweet talk? I can't say I didn't love it.) We picks me up at the airport in uniform and head to his friend's house,( who was nice enough to let us stay in his spare room while I was there) and saw I horrible accident on our way there, and these guys got right out of the car and starting helping someone who was hurt. We get to the house, watched movies together, kissed more times than I could count and fell asleep.
The next morning, we wake up together and he get's down on one knee and proposes to me.
The first thought in my mind when I saw him at the airport is "here we go again". Because I knew. I knew I was falling for him, again. So of course I said yes. There was something in my heart telling me that I HAD to say yes, saying no would've broke my heart, too. So we spend the four days I had together. I cried, he laughed. I never wanted to leave this moment, I had honestly never felt so happy and so at peace with myself in my life. Worry about leaving started to settle in though, and I by the day before the last my heart had just sunk. I knew after I left he would be deployed soon and I'm so in love with him, I hated to think about not being able to call him everyday and visit him and live this time together. I started feeling jealous and worried about other women, and feel self-conscious about my body and other things. I started wondering, "why did he pick me? why would God have us find each other just to be torn apart by something neither of us can change." He doesn't want to change, either. He wants to fight for his country and I am so proud of him, it just hurts he's not here.
So the last day he drops me off at the airport, (we're late, big surprise!) and he waits until my plane leaves the ground. I was waving to him and crying and blowing kisses while going through security, I didn't care if I looked crazy. He calls me through my layover, and calls my mom as soon as I'm gone and confides in her (how sweet).
It was the worst feeling I had ever experienced getting on the plane back home and having to get pulled farther and farther away by every minute that passed by. Since he's been gone, I've been looking up ideas for care packages to send. Finding out information about sending things there, looking for wedding ideas (i'm a horrible planner), working, and just missing him so much I feel like I'm just going to drop one day. I sleep with a notepad by my bed (with the phone right next to my ear) just in case he calls and wakes me up and I can't remember everything he said, so I'll write it down. I look at the space next to my bed and can't help but think he belong's there.
Problem is: I know I love him, but will he still love me when he get's back? This is like a story right out of a Nicholas Sparks book, does love like that really exist? Can I trust this to be the real thing? I hear so many things about how I'm too optimistic about our relationship and how it won't go the way I planned. Too many people telling me that love like ours isn't real. Telling me that we'll never make it. I feel like it's real, but I how do I know how he feels, especially if he's so far away?
danibelle91 danibelle91
18-21, F
1 Response May 18, 2012

It's there, don't let anyone else tell you otherwise. If you catch yourself smiling for no reason and not just a lil smile the really dorky smile that only you get when your thinking about someone you love. Is he all you think about day and night? I know this sounds so stereotypical but just roll with me here. Does take your breath away, just standing there. Do you feel you can fly when you're with him. From what I gather from this. It's there, it's real. If he kept getting a hold of you all this time. He's into you and into you for the long run. That's how I see it. Like they say Love has no boundaries. Doesn't matter if you're 45 miles away or 45000 miles away. There is a song it's an old song from the Dixie Chicks called Traveling Soldier. Listen to it. It's pretty awesome song. Listen to it and you'll understand why. But if you need someone to vent to feel free to send me a message.