Tough Decision

So I am at a moment of complete confusion. My fiance will get back from deployment this spring, and we are getting married once he's on his long leave. I have the whole wedding planned now so I can be flexible on his final date of return, as there is no guarantee of when it might be. What's sad - that's not the super stressful and confusing part.
I currently go to college in Idaho. I'm in my second year. When he returns, he's gonna be sent on the other side of the country. I "know" I should finish school, but I don't want to be away from him, especially after we are married. I am thinking of quitting school to be over there. Now, there are options. Try to transfer to Fayetteville State University. Restart school back up when we head back over to Idaho after he is out of the army (about two years). Or... just quit school. I don't actually want a career. I went to college in the first place because I had nothing else to do. Now I am just going to get a bachelors degree so I can get my alternative teaching certification (I dislike education programs). But even the teaching is because all I want to be is a mom. If I end up having to work, then teaching works around having a family. I wish my dream of having a photography business and later on an antique store could come to fruition - then I wouldn't have to worry about school and having to possibly supply a second income with a job.
This is so confusing! And school is stressing me out anyways (not school work, that's easy. I mean, I'm in Honors College [which is another reason I feel like I shouldn't quit]). I hate the town and the rude people around. It's getting so bad that my mom actually suggested that I quit school, saying maybe it's not meant for me. The sadness of him deployed and then school on top of that is causing a depression that is literally creating physical impacts. And this confusion doesn't help.
He says he doesn't want me to quit, but he'll stand by me either way. However, since I mentioned the possibility, he's been asking me if I want to buy or rent a house over there and such. I think he's excited about the prospect of me living over there with him. And so am I.
I think my real cause of strife is I'm caring what other people will think. Everyone already expected me to fail school - don't know why, I had a 4.0 in high school and everything. But yeah, everyone always does. And quitting proves them right. But not quitting means I'm away from him for 2 years.
The answer is easy, but the act is difficult. GRRRRAWR

(Sorry, really needed to vent and clear things in my head)
KayCeeEliz KayCeeEliz
18-21, F
1 Response Dec 5, 2012

Try doing you last two years online that's what I'm doing now just because its more convention and I don't have to stress. About quitting school because all I have to do is make sure I have wifi and do the work....try it its better then spent two years apart good luck