Torn In Two

To make a really long story short, I'm married to a wonderful man who would do anything for me. Up until lately. I meet and fell in love with a very open lesbian. My husband knew that we were friends and he was okay with that. I must say that we were friends for 6 months before it came out that we were in love with each other at one point me and b had the most amazing sex that I ever had. In the weeks following us being together we started fighting a lot . My husband knew that me and her were fighting a lot but he just thought it was about some problems she was having. After b and I having a really huge fight about her just wanting to be friends because she said she couldn't tear my family apart.
My husband and I were growing apart way before I met b. So one night while having a fight with my husband I told me him that I was sexually attracted to b. Needless to say he didn't take the news very well, which is my fault
B has started seeing one of her exs I've tried to walk away from her many times she has done the samething but their is something that keeps us coming back to each other. We haven't been together since that night. We talk all the time even through her g/f says she can't.
A few days ago my husband and I were fighting again. I finally told him that I was in love with her. I really do love my husband be I have a really hard time showing it to him. In this whole process of this mess, he went and told my family about b.
I don't know what to do. I really do love my husband and I really do love b, but the love I have for them are different. I've tried to explain this to him. He doesn't understand the difference.
Me and b fight all the time about her girlfriend. Its been said more then once if it wasn't for my husband it would be different but she doesn't want to cause a divorce and she couldn't live with that.
I know that ib need to walk away from her but I can't. Something keeps pulling us back to each husband says cheating is cheating no matter what. He doesn't know that I slept with her. This would put him over the breaking point. I'm so torn apart by two people I love .
Sorry I kind of jump around. Its more of me just getting it off my chest.
butterflylov butterflylov
31-35, F
3 Responses Jul 21, 2010

Here is a good solution.<br />
Get him to have both of you, then you can have the most awesome **********.<br />
You keep each other busy he is working or occupied,<br />
and he gets to broaden his sexual experience.<br />
Once all is happy, the jealousy and issues will simply go away!<br />
It really is a beneficial deal for ALL!

hi this sounds crazy but i am happy to hear ur story i am also married with 2 small kids but recently have started to fancy women mr and mr,my husband knows i am bisexual and is fine with that as i hav been faithfull though out ar 13 yr realationship,he is a good dad and loves me in his way but all i want is to be with a women.<br />
i hav tryed to speak to a friend about it but her ego is so big that she just thinks i fancy her???which i dont .<br />
i hav no 1 to turn to for advice or just talk to.<br />
any way hope things work out for us both.

It sounds like your girlfriend has made a choice in a way. She's gotten a new gf, because she said she didn't want to tear apart your marriage. I totally understand what you're saying about the love not being the same. The only options it seems like you have is to take time out from your relationship from the woman you love out of respect to your husband AND her new girlfriend. Choose who you love more (even though the loves are different). OR see if you can get your husband to agree to an open marriage.<br />
<br />
It's so hard when you're in love with two people. I've been there too. I'm sorry for the emotional pain and strain this is causing you.