Recovering Assembly of God Baptist
I was raised in Assembly of God denomination Church's. Anyone who has been to one of these churches should understand why I say recovering in my title. I was required to go to church approximately 3X's a week. I was baptized 8 or 9 times each time because of ADD related problems in school. My parents were told that demonic forces were inside me because of behavior and attention problems in school. Which in turn led to many hours of people "laying on hands" and intense prayer.The "antics" that took place in these churches where crazy they include but are not limited to seizure's supposedly brought on by God. Preachers slamming people in the head with olive oil where they subsequently fall down and convulse. Children forced to pray for hours so that they might get "filled with the holy spirit". All along I was told if I just had more faith all my problems would disappear.
When I was 25 I started going to a Unitarian church they had a Buddhist group there that I started going to. I feel that I am devoted to Buddhism as my way of life now but I still struggle with this feeling that I am going to go to hell. I know that this comes from years of brain washing but it's still there. My husband is also a Buddhist and when he makes comments about there not being a God it still makes me cringe. Has anyone else experienced this?How can I get passed this feeling?