The Gift Of Life?

When you think about what your perfect life would be like, what comes to mind?
Happiness? Love? Family? Money?
For me, one word comes to mind.

Normal.

As a child living with my crack addicted guardians, my Aunt & Uncle, I always looked out my window at night and looked for the brightest star.

Kids always make up they're own rules to games, so I always allowed myself 3 wishes on the brightest star.

Wish #3 (the least important) That _______ (insert boy crush of the week) liked me too!
Wish #2 A cool new bike!
My number one wish was always the most important one
Wish #1 That I could just have a normal, happy life.

I made that wish almost every night for years. I loved my Uncle. Dont get me wrong, he hurt me too. But he was my blood and I loved him. My Aunt, Eh... I could do without her.

When you look at my wishes, you can see and understand my young innocence.

Most people are brought up believing that life is a gift. Its instilled in them that every  day, every moment, is precious and to value it. In my case i feared every day, every moment.

If life is a gift then, what the hell did i do so bad to get a box of pain and misery under my tree? What did I do to deserve what I had to live through?

What did any of us do to deserve this?

Hell is on earth. This is your task, to make it out alive. But the only way you can make it out alive is if you let go. But damn, the past has a tight grip. And the memories are slowly killing me inside out.
Exxotiica Exxotiica
26-30, F
May 13, 2012