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Everyone Does It!!

I was so little. I was young didn't know any better i guess. But he was older, and he knew it was wrong. Yet he choose to hurt me, lie to me, make me feel worthless. Five years have passed and no one knows. I need to tell my little secret! Who will help me get over it? Who?
emily98 emily98 16-17, F 5 Responses Jun 6, 2012

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Hello there Emily. I see you want someone to talk too, if you want message me. I will be there to offer you support. Keep your chin up hun xx

Honey, if you can't tell your parents, tell an aunt, or a teacher, or somebody; please, you do need to tell someone. These things don't just go away, and they can rob you of every happiness and joy that life can offer.

Emily,<br />
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When I was fourteen I started drinking. By the age of twenty-one I had become a full blown alcoholic. My favorite drink was bourbon and hydrocodone. This was all because I wasn't strong enough to admit I was abused when I was young. I wasn't strong enough to fight against the tide of depression that overcame me and kept me silent. Instead, I chose to get drunk and try, in a passive way, to kill myself. <br />
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You, however, have just done something that most people spend decades in therapy trying to do. You've come to the realization that somebody abused you and that it was not right or your fault. You're stronger than I ever was, even now most likely. <br />
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As to who will help you get over this? You will. There is no magic pill or shoulder to cry on that will solve the issues you have and will continue to have because of this. What solves these issues is speaking out about them. By being honest and open and forcing others to listen to these uncomfortable truths, you are healing yourself. By demanding from others their attention and their respect, you begin the process of becoming what this world needs - a survivor. <br />
<br />
Whenever you feel depressed or lonely or isolated or just angry, remember that you were able to survive this person's hideous actions. Truly, I cannot think of anything that is as brave, as strong as that. Rather than dwelling on the negatives of this situation, I urge you to focus on the fact you survived this. <br />
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Know also that there IS help for you if you wish to seek it out. If your parents are trustworthy and were not the ones who abused you or allowed the abuse to occur, go to them and tell them the truth. If they hate you for this, then look elsewhere. Speak with the police, seek help from groups that specialize in childhood abuse. There are an incredible amount of them for women specifically. <br />
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Most importantly, Emily, never give up. You'll live through this. You'll endure where others cannot. Find happiness in knowing you are so incredibly strong. And remember this when you have succeeded in your healing, remember that there are others like you who need encouragement and who need somebody to remind them of how awe-inspiring they are. <br />
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The last thing I wish to mention is that you would do well to begin educating yourself on the effects of abuse. Do not read articles published in magazines you'd find at a grocery store or on news websites. Go and find "peer reviewed" journals (that is the keyword, "journal") on the effects of abuse on women. Peer reviewed means that the paper written was analyzed by others in the field of psychology (typically in regards to papers on childhood abuse it will be within the confines of psychology) and checked for faults. Essentially, they are articles written by experts that were then reviewed by experts. <br />
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By educating yourself you'll be that much more likely to survive this and come out as an example for others to follow. <br />
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I wish you the best of luck and pray that when you look in the mirror you see not a victim but a survivor.

ACP, you do most absolutely ROCK!

Hi.. I would like to be friends.. If u want, plez send me a message

Dear Emily, please tell one or both of your parents. As a Dad I can tell you that they are on your side and would not want you to be trying to deal with this alone. I am saddened every time I hear of this type of abuse. If you are still aware of the perpetrators location, report him to the police. It will be hard to dredge up painful memories, and hopefully your parents can help you get counselling, but he is a criminal and should be treated as such. If you need, I'm on most days and can message back and forth if you wish. Hugs, G