This Is My Story

I was abused by people other than my parents.  The first time I was abused was the summer before first grade when I was 6.  I had this babysitter who to punish me, would put all of my favorite stuffed animals in the freezer than lock it so I could not get them out at all.  The worst part of it was when he would hit my sister hard. I saw him do it alot and I was scared to tell my parents.  Fourtunatly he got fired when my mom walked in on him throwing a steak knife at my sister so he got fired.

Fast forward six years now it's the fall when I was in sixth grade I was twelve.  I had a cousin who molested me once by playing simon says.  He said we had to be quiet and why we were playing he molested me.  I told my mom about six months later.  Did she do anything?  NO!  she said she would talk to my aunt about it.  Nothing came about it so it got swept under the rug but I was more wary of him and would not go anywhere alone with him.  My mom would be like "did he touch you "? after we all would go swimming.  I thought she was being sarcastic.

From spring of sixth grade till junior year of high school I was basically the punching bag of my block.  I was routenely hit and had rocks and other stuff thrown at me and the hurt like hell.  I was afraid to go outside to do anything but my parents sent me out anyways.  I think the worst was the people who abused me were younger.  I hated that the ring leader would ask me to have sex with him and I would say no so I'd get harmed but I kept refusing.

I have Ptsd from all of this but I REFUSE to let it get me down!  I won because I survived They were the idiots I was not.  My parents did not do too much but I have a quesdtion WHY?! They saw what was going on but did NOTHING!

I love my parents but can't talk to them about it.

littleangel1976 littleangel1976
36-40, F
8 Responses Feb 24, 2010

I am better. My husband is good at listening and I feel much safer now in my 30's than when I was little. I am glad I am stronger than I used to be.

Hey, you are pretty strong. I am glad you survived, and now like to help others. :)<br />
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I know I may never get answers but I am content with life. I am glad my story is helping people because I don't want to have anyone feel alone also

You may never get the answer to your questions. I never got any answerts from my family accept denail. You are a strong person. It takes courage to look at what happened.

Congrats! :) It gives me hope to know that your truly a survivor. :) *hugs!*

You are right! Until you look at your abuse(s), they will always be laying around with you having no control over where or when you'll stumble over them. Now you can't say the abuse has followed you around all your life. Congratulations!

Thank you for commenting on my story. I know my parents have a hard time that thier "baby" got abused. I am keeping up the fight by not letting them win. by the way I know I'm winning because I am married and on my own and no one can harm me ;-)

sometimes parents are too scared to stand up to people, even if it is for their little ones. Being a parent is hard, there's no class for it, no education, nothing. You either get it right, or mess up. I'm sorry that your parents never did anything for you when they most certainly should have. Sometimes they go into denial about everything and ignore it and pretend it never happened. *hugs* I'm glad to see that you aren't letting them win though. Fight back and when you think you're in a corner fight your way out, it feels great after you're finished :).