How Do We Become Special Mothers

After my third child was born and we discovered he has mutliple handicaps the story beolw was given to me by someone.  I have kept this story for over 20 years and when ever the daily taking care of my son starts to get to me I take it out and read it.

I have given this to many others through the years and have shared it when ever I can.  I do it now in hopes that someone will get as much comfort from it as I have through the years.

It is a wonderful touching story and as a special mother has helped me to realize how special I truly am.  We all need to remember this as we care for our special needs children.

The Special Mother
by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social
pressures and a couple by habit.

This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children.
Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen?

Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for
propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs
His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son. Patron saint...give her Gerard. He's used to

"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter. Patron saint, Cecelia."

"Rutledge, Carrie; twins. Patron saint, Matthew."

Finally He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped

The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God, "Could I give a handicapped child to a mother who
does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But has she patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of
self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll
handle it."

"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that
is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to
give her has her own world. She has to live in her child's world and
that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you." God smiles, "No matter,
I can fix that. This one is perfect - she has just enough selfishness." The
angel gasps - "selfishness? is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally,
she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child
less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied.
She will never take for granted a 'spoken word'". She will not consider a
step" ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will
be present at a miracle, and will know it!"

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty,
prejudice....and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone.
I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she
is doing My work as surely as if she is here by My side".

"And what about her Patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in

God smiles, "A mirror will suffice."



Grits4life Grits4life
46-50, F
4 Responses Aug 15, 2008

Im sitting here crying-that was so touching and ever so stregthning. A very encouraging outlook-like turning sour lemmons into lemonaide. thank you for that uplift -it was much needed

you really have touched me with that poem...I am a mother with 4 children oldest is 20 and is Bipolar , my only daughter is 18 and has add and Bipolar, my 12 yr old is Autistic, ADHD and Hearing Impaired and my 5yr old has ADHD and is possably Bipolar ..were awaiting a Dr. Appointment...Life has been stressfull to say the least !..but we were chosen for a reason and what I just read proves it ! ...thankyou for that !

I am going to print this out and stick it near my front door so I can read it before leaving my house everyday.

you humble me Dia. I truly do not feel I am any different than you. My life experience has just placed me in a different spot. Each of us has to "bare our on cross". It's the way we live our lives with it that determines our worth. I also beleive we are to help and share with one another the wisdom we gain from our experiences.<br />
<br />
Thank you for the "You Rock".