I was circumcised when I was 9. It is common in the village where I am from and I was surprised to know they don't do it at all lots of places.

Now in my country there are laws against it but most people still do it......

It was not awkward to have sex with guys at home but I don't want to in the US because people will think it was weird. My gynecologist was really upset about it.

It isn't right. It isn't like what they do to baby boys. We are older and it is a lot they removed. It hurt.

Emirembe Emirembe
22-25, F
29 Responses Aug 10, 2008

Although I'm sad this was done to you without your permission, I know plenty of guys in the U.S. think it's incredibly sexy and hot looking. Myself included.

A feeling shared by most males in cultures where this is "traditional", I'm sure...and quite a number of females. I'm totally opposed, though, at doing it on older girls in the painful way it is often done. If it is an important tradition and its lack would mean exclusion of the girl from society, let it be done early and painlessly, like for baby boys.

See, I prefer if there is just the labia majora, and the vaginal opening. Get rid of the mess that is the inner labia and the clitoris (hood and all). It's just a mess down there, and with all that other stuff done away, the whole area down there just looks cleaner, more aesthetically pleasing (at least to me), and feels nicer. I love it! Wish more girls nowadays would be down for it!

Since there are differences in size and thickness between clitorises and labia, some girls probably hurt more when cut than others, obviously. The main problem is of course the unsanitary conditions in which these operations are often done, and the fact it is extremely painful and can have a lasting effect on girls' sexuality; if full external clitoral removal has to be done, it is a delicate operation, calling for skilful surgical work, anesthesia, postoperative care starting with painkillers, and not someone with a razor blade slicing you off live in a garage somewhere and letting you agonize with a wound between your legs for weeks. Done in sanitary conditions and with anesthesia it may possibly disappear gradually or become more common (because people will keep doing it even if it's considered "illegal", since for many an uncut woman is not quite a "real" woman) but the right of girls to keep their clitoris intact or not will not be forced from outside their cultureupon a population which prides itself on a connection between cutting of girls and womanhood (labia are another matter, since labioplasty is considered and acceptable and current practice in cosmetic surgery worldwide, particularly with large labia) In a number of cultures where having female genitalia "cut" in some way the cut is now often officially limited to removal of the clitoral hood (analogous in its principle to male circumcision, although there is no comparison) or even just a scratch on the clitoris, but that does not offer better results, and may indeed create more itching rather than providing females with better control of their sexuality. Anyway, you're beautiful and I'm sure none of your American lovers will complain or find you weird...

hello its was sad to hear that ur also cut, i was done at 8years old in my home by a old lady

Hello! I'm Very want dating with you! I long time look for female circumcision girls, any money all with you... please write me mike.colorstudio for google mail

See, girls, not everyone will consider you as freaks, quite to the contrary...

It is like what they do to boys in the sense that genital tissues is removed without the consent of the owner. Some will say that it's worse for girls because more is removed. So, would it be okay for girls if they just removed less tissue, say just the inner labia?

You over look the fact that places where circumcision on girls is done in unsanitary conditions it is also done the same way with boys. Lots of boys die in Africa from circumcision. The Stalings study shows that female circumcision reduces HIV in women by 60%. Even in your own argument you say that there are benefits to removing tissue from females sometimes - "excessively large or unsightly parts of the lips". So there is very much a relationship between the two operations, you just choose not to see it.

Why not look at the research rather than deciding and dismissing it without thinking.

There is research, it's called the Stalings study. It was a review of three studies conducted in Tanzania amongst female prostitues there (AKA high risk for contracting HIV). The conclusions were that a female who was circumcised had a 60% lower chance of contracting HIV. If you look at the medical literature from muslim countries they have loads of research saying female circumcision is good for girls. Just like we crank out research saying it's good for boys.

I do not advocate circumcision for anyone without the owner of those genitals being given the chance to choose for themselves. The fact of the matter is that any argument for circumcision of a boy can be applied toward circumcision of a girl. Cultures that circumcise girls think that an uncircumcised girl has a mess of skin flaps between her legs, smells bad, retains ****** (white goo) and is at a higher chance of contracting a yeast or bacterial infection - all true. The question is do these reason justify cutting a child's genitals? If natural genitals look gross is the problem with the person who thinks they look gross. We can clean odour and ****** away with soap and water. Washing also reduces infections. Females get the vast majority of unitary tract infections - surely they would benefit the most from genital surgery. And when doing your research you might want to try a source a bit more reliable and reputable than fox news!

At the end of the day, any health benefits form circumcision can be reproduced and bettered using soap and water and condoms - which don't require cosmetic genital surgery on children, the risk of infection and surgical error.

And by the way, how is cutting a boy's penis and then sticking the open wound in a diaper full of poo cleaner or healthier?

OK, obviously you're an intactivist flamer. This doesn't change anything to the fact that your supposed studies on FGM are ,,,in your mind only, at best, and that studies on the effect of circumcision in male newborns are perfectly accurate.

Since you can't string together a coherent sentence I guess there is no point in further discussing issues with you. I am not a in-activist (or rather "intactivist" as you spelled it). Rather I believe in rational though. If one can't rationally explain why it is good to cut the genitals of one gender but not the other perhaps the issue needs some thought. Clear, rational thought.

Thank you hurling. I just wish we could have a discussion on the topic based on logic and fact rather than emotion.

I can only imagine that such a traumatic event so early in life must effect a developing brain.

4 More Responses

i want to talk with a circumcised women and want to hear her poor and miserable story with her own voice. Is there any one?

Mutilated women will probably not chat with anyone about it. They live in cultures where talking about genital problems is taboo except possibly between very close female friends. None of them would post on a sex blog in EP. So anyone posing as a «circumcised woman» is very likely...a fake.

Well, you may have a little scar in lieu of the external part of your ****, it makes you neither better nor worse, but if I had sex with you I'd be happy to have you as you are...

I was circumcise at the age of 11 and i remember every minute of it,its the worst pain ever.I am from west africa and Mandingo tribe.I have a daugter and brought her to the USA so she can avoid going through the same thing.I cannot tell you what i miss in sex,because i have ****** I would have love to play with my ****,the bad thing is that no one can stop women circumcision

Its sad to hear that but <br />
many time i came accross to hear this<br />
how is it done and what process

i'm very sad for you. I'm european woman and aged 75 y. My older sister was excised at âge 8 y because in that time (years before WWar II ) ************ was a sin and harmful they though.<br />
For me I was saved because the war and after the war I was to old to this to me.<br />
I thing all women would keep choice to be circumcised or not.

In the 19th and 20th century in Europe the external part of the clitoris was removed in the case of excessive ************ in young girls. To a large extent, it stopped what it was supposed to stop. We've moved to more psychological treatment about the psychological, not physical, causes of excessive ************ in young girls. This does not mean that there may not be actual vulvar or clitoral problems to be dealt with.

CC - in your comment of 10 Aug 2008: "..after my blog today"<br />
<br />
I've searched and can't find a blog of yours on that date.<br />
<br />
Can you provide more info/link? please!

i really feel for you. although i had an opperation to remove my outer labia at the age of 19 because they were really big and i was extremely self concious of it. since having it done im much more happy and not shy sexually. it should not be done the way and for reasons it is in some countries but in my case it made me much more confident with my self..

I am delighted that you have brought this out here. <br />
<br />
Could you describe what part of you was removed? How did they get you to do this at age 9 or 12 for Carolinalji? <br />
<br />
How do you think the guys in the US would think you were weird and how would they not want to have sex with you? Good men have sex to express their love with the woman, no matter how she looks in her vulva.

well I passed through the same experience when I was 12. I had in a clinic but without real Anesthesia. I am now 29 years old but can remember this day to be of the worst days in my life. I was in pain for days and after I was healed, I started to develop some problem which I knew later to be post traumatic disorder. I started to lose my popularity at school and feeling afraid all the time without realizing the reasons. I read tow days after this experience about the harms of this practice and I started to doubt my family in every thing since that day. <br />
<br />
I had that problem of feeling hateful to men and I couldn't get into any sort of relationship including marriage of course. I think I will be ended up too lonely for that!

Carolinalji, your profile doesn't give any indication of sex or location - no pictures of course. Your post here is so incoherent that it's hard to believe you're simply not a flamer. Having you clitoris removed, if anything, would have made you popular at school - in cultures where this is (unfortunately) prevalent discrimination goes against girls who have not have it done and who are constantly insulted. Plus the fact that if this was not a fake post, you would more than likely have been married in an arranged marriage anyway.

Thanks for the information Cripple Crow. Now I feel sick. What's wrong with people that they can do this ****?

I'm so sorry ...

Emirembe,<br />
I feel sorry for what happened to you. Like EBunbury said, sexual intimacy can be enjoyed in more than one ways - and I pray that you'll enjoy a fulfilled life in this world and the Next. However, I hope that women in your country advise their men and brothers, and raise boys that stop this practice. God will not change the condition of a people if they don't change it themselves. (teachings of Prophet Muhammad) Women deserve honor and respect, not manipulation and torture. May God guide them all and bless you with love. Sister in Nature, NR

I am so sorry that this was done to you. I can't imagine the pain that you endured because of this. <br />
Hugs, CMR

Thank you everyone for your support. Lin this sounds very bad I haven't ever seen this. I feel sorry for that poor girl.<br />
<br />
I do know lots of things besides sex but sex is not just something you can pass on for your whole life either.

I have heard about this terrible practice for many years. It makes me, as a fellow woman, cringe to think about what you had to endure. There are advocacy groups out there that are trying to spread the word, and help put a stop to, this barbaric practice.<br />
<br />
I am so sorry you had to suffer through such an inhumane experience Emirembe. Do not be embarrassed or ashamed of who you are or what was done to you. It was something that you, as a young girl, were powerless to stop. <br />
<br />
Also, there are many paths to physical intimacy and when you find someone who truly understands, accepts, appreciates and loves you for who you truly are, then you will be able to begin to journey down those paths together.<br />
<br />
I wish you all the best for your life.<br />
<br />
(((HUGS))) ~Pixie

Thank you for your share. Be Strong! God Bless!

I have read a lot about this. Although i have read about a few other things being done aswell. I think its wrong. My heart goes out to you and all other women in the same boat as yourself...

All I am going to say is ((((HUGE HUGS )))) to you! I am lots for words.

I have heard of this, but never met anyone who had it done. I'm sorry this happened to you. As for sex, while I can appreciate that it creates problems, there are other ways to intimacy with a loved one, and one who loves you will come to understand.<br />
<br />
Bless you.<br />
<br />
:-) E. Bunbury

I am of the opinion that people do not need to have parts of their bodies sliced off!<br />
Many blessings upon you Emirembe...<br />
Sincerely,<br />

I am from the mother country myself and at boarding school. After sports one day myself and 5 other girls decided that we had had it with cold water and we hopped in a bath tub that was only reserved for girls with their period and while we took turns taking a hot bath (we were all in the bathroom) I noticed something hanging between the one girls legs and I screamed and asked what is that? She went on to tell me that as a little girl her grand mother would use a lubricant and pull her clitoris and now at age 15 it was down to her knees and she would tuck it into her vagina....supposed to enhance sexual pleasure for men when they thrust i and out of the vagina..i was shocked.

Given the extreme modesty of societies where women are cut, this is a very unlikely story, more like a male fantasy...sorry

Yeah it takes away a lot sometimes and it just ruins sex......... u don't experience ******?? i'm genitally mutilated too.

i'm sorry that happened to you *hugs* CC is's not right for any reason at just seems to me that's taking away from your womanhood, which should never be done in the first place

Yeah it isn't right. There isn't even a religious reason for it at all because it is mutilation which is not right in Christianity or Islam which are for some reason used to make it okay?<br />
<br />
It really hurt it was probably the worst pain ever I felt. Sex now just feels like something is missing?