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How I Came Out To My Little Sister

  I remember I was around 14 and my sister and i used to go on this website that was kind of like a chat room but it was made by some magazine for grils around our age.  after a while of going on the site so long everyone had become close so i started posting things on the website about myself and people would give me advice. At one point I posted a question about how I should deal with being a lesbian when my whole family hated lesbians and gays and would kill me if I was gay.  I had been contemplating for days whether or not i should come out to my little sisterbecause we were always sort of close and she was the only one in my family that I knew for sure didnt really hate gays because she always stood up for them when people, namely my family, said horrible things abut them. After a while I decided that it wouldn't be a good thing if I told her because she runs her mouth a lot and eventually my family would find out once she got mad at me and literally the day after I decided no to tell her she went snooping around and found out I was gay.

Apparently she had read the posts I had written on the website and she confronted me about it in our room.  She was crying and i remember our conversation went something like this:

Sis:"Has someone been stealing your screenname on (the website) and posting comments

Me:(i immediately knew axactly what she was talking about and started stumbling over my words) No.. I-I mean yes... wait, why? (pretending like i don't know)

Sis:(crying harder) Is it true? i can't believe you said that about your whole family hating gays. I don't het gay people( and then she went on whining and b*tching)

Eventually the situation was resolved and she knew I was lesbian and I went downstairs because the only reason I had gone in my room was to get something to show my mother and my sister followed me in there so... I went downstairs and I kept talking to my mom and i was shaking so bad. When i sat down my leg kept bouncing up and down and I couldn't stop it and i was really struggling not to cry.  My mom made a joke about how hard I was shaking and I had to force myself to laugh. After that my sister started being really nice to me, like very nice like offering to do stuff for me. After a few days she got tired of it though and went back to her rude, annoying self.  She often threatens to tell on me whenever she gets really angry and its really annoying. She also does really dumb stuff like when someone will make fun of gay people she'll look at me in a really obvious way.  She's such a dumba**. Oh my god.

  I remember one time last summer when my little sis my older sis and i were walking home from somewhere and she started yelling and saying she should have told when she first found out about me and my older sister kept going wht, what did you find out.  It was really weird.  She's such a drama queen god, I can't wait to get away from my family.

Also, i'm not sure but i think my older sister knows I'm gay.  Cuz of what my little sis did and cuz of some other stuff, like cuz she read this notebook of mine where I kind of wrote a prayer to God(even though I'm atheist) when i was like 10 or 11 to make me stop having lesbian feelings for other girls (this, of course, did not work). And also around that time whe I was 10 and stuff she used to stand up for gay people.  I called her gay once and she said something like this:"I'm not gay, but even if I were, there wouldn't be anything wrong with that." but now she's always talking about how much she hates gays. Needless to say I'm not coming out to anyone else in my family anytime soon.

One more thing: I've realized the only person I've come out to willingly that I actually know was to my friend from band. I just told her one day about this girl I liked (the xylophone girl, lol) and she was like are you bisexual and i said maybe, and then a little bit later i was like i hardly like boys and she was cool with it. And you know what the best part was, this whole "coming out" thingy happened over texting so I never had to say it out loud. She's just awesome like that. She even thinks the girl I like is pretty, but who doesn't? :P Now i just gotta work on saying it out loud, though it sounds very weird(trust me, I've tried saying "I'm a lesbian" to myself in the mirror whenever I'm alone in the house.)

Love you guys!

mickey

mickeymouseclub15 mickeymouseclub15 18-21, F 2 Responses May 8, 2010

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don't feel bad I'm in a relationship with my bff and my little sister caught us making out and now she blackmails me for everything!

now that makes me feel really glad i only have one sister ^^ yeah i remember this same thing well sorta kinda same thing happened to me i was like wut 11? or 12 at the time and i would talk non<x>stop about this girl in my house in 6 grade and my sis soon found out i like girls right after that though it's kinda switched im the younger one and she's older so yeah she figured it out in like half that year then the end of 6 grade i told my friends who i liked and yeah whole different story