Cnfused!

Hey, so i just found this group and would really appreciate some advice. For years ive known im a bit different - whilst i may find guys attractive, as soon as it comes to anything more i just freeze, Im not interested nor do i want anything more intimate with them. Iv been quite an angry and not very happy person up until now until i met what is now one of my best friends. She is a lesbian and I'v since done things with her i wouldnt even consider doing with a guy. However, she has a girlfriend and nothing could ever happen between us. Im just coming to terms with the fact that I might be a lesbian, but this is hard when iv denied these thoughts for so long. I just want to be sure that this is not just a phase or not just limited to this one person, but how do i know? I feel so confused right now!

Thanks for listening.
ratherconfused ratherconfused
18-21
3 Responses Jul 12, 2010

I had a similar experience.<br />
I'm a man though, but here's what happened..<br />
<br />
I always knew I liked girls(that should have been a clue) but I also knew that I didn't want to be the closed-minded person that knows I like girls and leave it at that. So I began exploring the possibility that I might be bi or possibly gay. I met lots of hot guys and still find guys very hot sometimes(Johnn Depp, Brad Pitt(beardless), Edward and Jacob) but once I got myself a boyfriend and we were teasing each other in my bedroom..alone..with the door closed....Well lets just say that's a bad time to realize I don't like guys like that. <br />
<br />
I feel very bad for breaking his heart, I cared for him deeply and he was very hot. If I was a gay man I would have been a very lucky gay man... Sadly I'm not into guys once we start kissing. The hand-holding was fine, I even adored the hugs we had but I know now how I stand on the issue of me with another man. <br />
<br />
This isn't the same as your story, but if you picture the narrator of it(me) as a girl it sounds like it might be similar. I often wondered if I was meant to be a girl and something went awry in the development process..but I know if I was meant to be a girl I was meant to be a lesbian girl.<br />
<br />
Good luck in figuring out who you're interested in, sometimes it can take years to understand.

It is very normal for a young woman to go through these things and as cathielove said, you're not alone. You might want to talk about this with your friend and explore the possibilities with different people, male and female and see what works for you.<br />
There is no cut and dry answer for you, saddly you have to figure that out for yourself.<br />
However, if you have any questions, just ask :)

I know what you're feeling, you're not alone