Scarlet Letter

Lesbian is a curse word in my town. You can say f--k, p--s, sh-t, and even c---, but “lesbian” has to be whispered under your breath. It is a word no one says and a subject that no one talks about. No one acknowledges the large population of lesbians that live in this town, probably because no one sees them. They walk through town like ghosts, very few can see them and even fewer admit that they can. It is almost like a scarlet letter thing. As if all the lesbians wear a scarlet “L” on their clothes just to ensure that no one speaks to them, and if someone does speak to them they are either rude or pretend like they are some strange foreigner.

So is it really any wonder that I haven’t come out? Is it really hard to understand that I don’t want my town to know, to pin an “L” on my sleeve? I like being noticed for all the right reasons. I like positive attention. I like having friends and being treated like a person. So yes I am very selective as to who I let into my little circle of truth.

I don’t want to be hurt. I don’t want to be stoned, ostracized, or thrown out of the city. I want love and acceptance. I don’t want to be treated any differently than anyone else. I just want to be the same me that I have always been but more. I want to be the me that I have always kept hidden. The me that I have beaten down. The me that I have tried to abuse into nothingness. I want to be the me that I am. And what’s more, I want everyone to treat me the same as when I was hiding her. That might be a little irrational, but that is what I want.
Token1592 Token1592
18-21, F
2 Responses Oct 3, 2012

That the voice of every lesbian i feel.. Hey how are you doing...? hope you are fine.. Some people are orthodox & hence cant change.. They grew but their brain doesnt.. If you feel like you are stuck in a prison then its time to fly to a nation where you are accepted:)

Its funny because I used to be bullied by being called"Lesbian"just 'cause i didn't have a"boyfriend".its ironic.My support for you.Good luck.keep your head high up&they can rot in hell.