Muslim Gay Needed A Lesbian Muslim Girl For Marriage.

 
Im a muslim gay aged 29, good looking. Im looking for a lesbian girl for marriage. There will be no sex, but i love to have kids also because of family pressure to get married. Im from kerala a state in INDIA. Looking for a girl whose educated, good famil background and age less than 25.

raihan84 raihan84
26-30, M
2 Responses Jan 19, 2013

PS: I'm also muslim, and our religion says nothing bad on homosexuality. Society is the one that says our religion condemns homosexuals ;)

Hello,
I'm also gay, I'm 21 and from Indian background, but I was born and live in Europe.
I can imagine your pressure to get married and please your family, as I feel it even with 21 years.
I have a cousin who gay and is 12 years older than me. He is 33 and he's been married to a woman for 9 years. They have kids, and everyone looks happy. Well, they look happy, but they aren't. They have to live a lie. My cousin is dying each day from the inside. His wife is a wonderful girl, I love her very much, but I see that she is losing her light each time I see her. I see that she understands her husband doesn't wish for her. And the kids grow up in this false environment. I believe even their family notice this.

My cousin got married because it was a solution at the time, to remove the pressures he was getting. But it was a lie, and what happens with lies? At first, they solve you your problem and you are relieved. Then the lie starts to haunt you. You manage to fill the gaps with other small lies, and everything seems fine.
Then as time passes, the lie just doesn't go away and those small lies don't work to cover the big lie. Then you have to make bigger lies, and this happens years after the first lie was told. And by this time your family is so used to the situation, you have kids mixed with the situation that they will not accept easily what is going on, and the bigger lies become more horrible than your first lie. The lies just keep consuming you over and over, and then you realize that it was a huge mistake in the first place.

My cousin is happy with the kids he has, but he has admitted to me that he would have not made the same mistake again, if he had the chance to change. Lying is just not the best solution. It's a bad solution.

Having 29 years you might have some independence. You might have control over your financial life in case something goes wrong. It might be easier for you to just tell them that you don't want to get married instead of marrying a girl (lesbian or not). If they pressure you, just tell them, "this is my life, I choose what I want to be attached for the rest of my life. I'm the one getting married, not you, so as long AS I AM getting married, I MAKE THE CHOICE."
Trust me, your family will be less happy to know you married a lesbian and you're gay, than simply just discovering you're gay.

I'm not saying "Tell them you are gay". I'm saying "Don't lie."
And another advice, find a local LGBT support group because they certainly have better options than lying.
Trying to have a life with a same-sex person in India must be very difficult, but your mind will be clear because you are being true to yourself and others. Your mind will be much more clear than living a life lying.
If you life your life with a same-sex person, it will be VERY difficult in the BEGINNING. If you live your life lying, thing will grow to become difficult for the rest of your life and you'll regret this small decision that just solves a simple temporary problem - the pressure of getting married.

Think again carefully what do you really want for your life, my friend :)
Don't end up unhappy like many gay men out there. If you don't start living with a same-sex partner in India, society will not change.
Hugs