I Can't Hold It Another Day.

I have been compulsively lying since I was about 8yrs old. I had a very unstable household so i did not really no how to love myself or anyone else. the lying started to stay out of trouble, then escalated to trying to cover up my home life from the people in the outside world, then to wanting to fit in, lying about where i'm from,who i am,why i am here , then needing attention and so on and so on from there. Lying basically became a staple in my everyday conversations.. I can't still to this day say anything without lying or exaggerating in some way. its overwhelming and frustrating , i don't want to do this to my loved ones anymore or too myself. i am at turning point in my life where this has to end. This is me taking the first step to recovery. I figure if i learn to love myself then i will not have to lie sooo much about who i am because i will not be ashamed to be myself.
the truth is sometimes scarier than a telling a lie.
readytostop readytostop
22-25, F
Dec 4, 2012