Lost My Best Friend

today i came clean about a lot of things. stupid lies, some small and some big. but the all hurt my ex-girlfriend/best friend(we broke up because of distance). she means everything in the world to me. i lied about pretty much my entire life. over exaggerated made things up, all of it. now she has made it clear she never wants to be with me again and doesn't want to see me for a very long time. which i understand. i'm just trying to figure out how to make things better and it's hard. she's questioning if i was ever actually in love with her and i still am. if i wasn't i wouldn't have come clean. i just want o know what to do to make this better. i know it's going to take a long time and that is completely fine with me. i just dont want her trust in me to go to waste because i care about her more than anything. i hate myself for lying to her and i feel weak and pathetic and like a coward.
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 10, 2013