Finding Some Fun Online

When I started wearing hose and lingerie as a teen, there was a desire to share this fetish with someone who understands it and enjoys it as well. My wife is not into it, when the subject is brought up, she quickly shut it down. She finds it weird and not appealing. So, it’s not possible for me to leave her at this stage, and negotiating it seems to be a longshot so it stays tucked in the closet and I’ll wear sometimes when she’s not home.

Like just about anyone who likes to dress in fem things, there is a desire to be able to dress with someone. For that chance to dress and be with someone who accepts it and appreciates it is what probably a lot of us want to experience. That acceptance and understanding is something that is rare and elusive because it’s so taboo for a man to enjoy this in our society.

One outlet for dressing I’ve enjoyed recently is in an online world called Second Life. Essentially, you can go there, do whatever you wish with an avatar you create. People transform into all manner of things and role-play. I don’t need to sell anyone on the benefits of it are but it can be very interesting if you have fantasies and thoughts that might not be so easy to live out in your current situation.

Going in with an avatar that is male looking and deciding to dress him in lingerie is tremendously easy. Panties/stockings/garters and a bra can all be had quickly and cheaply. Shoes are generally a bit more pricey compared to others but no big deal, we’re talking a dollar or two usually. It’s like being able to dress a virtual Ken doll in Barbie’s things.

So, in a private place, I dressed him up. Walked around and felt a strange excitement about seeing this avatar in lingerie moving around. The familiar thoughts of this being socially taboo rushed back. Could I take my avatar anywhere or would he be scrutinized and risk being seen as a freak? Well, Second Life has a lot of crazy things going on in it and if you do a little homework, it’s easy to find places where just about anything that may interest you is encouraged.

One thing in Second Life is that you learn about a lot of phrases associated with dressing in fem gear. There are so many terms used: shemale/Transgender/T-Girl/Futanari/Crossdresser/femboy/gurl/sissy and so on and so on. Each seems to have a variety of definitions and meanings, which mean a different thing to everyone.

For the most part, the idea of gender bending is that it’s a man that looks like a woman. Not sort of like a woman but truly a beautiful woman that produces a **** when naked. A few, especially femboys are very girly looking men/boys but they don’t dress all the way in fem things for the most part, they just look soft/waifish.

Overwhelmingly, it seems to be beautiful women with a ****. That’s kind of how the whole ‘scene’ is in Second Life. There are instances of variety of course but my point is, someone like me fits outside that kind of standard. The clubs in Second life that cater to Crossdressing as a topic will have these beautiful women as about 80% of the attendees. The others are more the exception, still welcome, but obviously not part of the greater group that is accepted.

So I can go to these places, dressed in my normal male clothes and people are friendly and cordial. A lot of the t-girls are looking to meet men for sex. Some are looking for other t-girls as well and the role of top/bottom is pretty much up for debate. A huge majority of people seem to be submissive in nature, they want to be the bottom which can be a challenge. A room full of bottoms usually means that they are quiet and waiting for someone to reach out to them. When I scouted these places, most of the conversations I had were ones I initiated with men or t-girls just to learn more about the club, what the expectations were and so on.

Then, I took what I felt was a ‘big step’. Dressed my avatar in lingerie and entered the club. I mean, not wearing under my clothes but actually wearing heels/hose/lingerie and nothing else and walking in. It’s hard to explain it but I was not alone in my little outfit, some wear nothing! In a sea of bodies, mine was different because it’s obviously male, dressed in female things, but not out of place totally. There just are not any clubs that specific to men that dress, it’s too much of a niche.

Then it gets interesting. The one club I go to is actually set up for t-girls and black men for hookups. The t-girls are mostly like what I just said, beautiful women who have a ****, some show them openly and others conceal them until later. Then, there are the masculine men in that club, mostly black men with very muscular avatars who seem to be stoic and waiting for a woman to talk to them. Finally, there’s the hodge podge of others. I’d fit in that bucket as a man dressed in lingerie, and my avatar is white. There are gay men there, straight women and all manner of other random avatars but like 80% of them are t-girls and black guys.

What’s interesting is the people I talk to. I can talk with the females/t-girls about all kinds of things – shoes/clothes and such. Some want to help me with feminizing my look but that’s not a big goal for me. They help pass the time. Some are interested in me but for the most part, a guy in lingerie isn’t exactly what they’re looking for. It gets very interesting when it’s the men, black or white. The men there are about as submissive as you’d expect the women to be.

The premise of the club is that black men are ******* the t-girls. Pure and simple. However, there’s something lurking in there as well. I went there originally to see if I could find a man like me, unable to find a club just for me, looking to dress with another, similar, guy. But there aren’t that many so I sometimes sat a long time quietly because it seemed like the black men there were there just to **** the t-girls.

Finally, I was bored about talking about good places for lingerie with the t-girls so I chatted up a regular white guy near me. He was cool, had a decent look and we chatted. Soon, I found out he was gay in RL, finds t-girls fascinating but was aroused by my look. The cyber sex was very good and with the visuals of SL, it helps make it better. When we went to a place he had, he confessed he wanted to dress with me and be ‘sissy’ too. It was very hot to experience this, a man who is actually a lot like me – with a secret for loving lingerie.

Going back to the club another night, I sat and watched a while quietly and saw one of the black men there, his avatar huge and muscular. Here I am in panties and stockings and heels and figured I’d send him a private message. Now, he can tell me to **** off or be polite and ask to be left alone, that’s what I think would happen most of the time if a man is not into a ‘guy’ like me.

Within a few messages, it’s clear he’s ok with talking to me. We just talk about general interests, what brings us here to the club and kind of small talk. What I find interesting is if the person I’m talking with starts bringing up dressing and what I’m into. That is the sure sign, he is curious or also dresses already and wants to. Here I am, in this virtual world with a kind of slender white avatar in lingerie with a big, hulking black man towering over me and he’s quietly telling me how he wants to have a chance to dress with me and have cyber sex. Hearing them confess what they have kept secret, how it’s taboo for them socially to be anything but alpha males but that they want something so badly that nobody can know about is very hot.

However silly it may sound, it’s really a turn on meeting a man who portrays such a macho and masculine side and he is quietly confessing he is just like me. He’s masculine to the world, he is straight acting, at the club he’s expected to be there to **** a t-girl, yet he’s talking to me and telling me he wants to leave with me and be submissive and in panties with me. The chat and fun can get very heated and erotic with these men when they are doing something so ‘unusual’.

It’s not an isolated thing. Of course there are men who are not into it, but I just quietly chat with a guy and find out rather quickly which way his interests lay. For those who want a t-girl, most usually say ‘no thanks’ but the ones that have a conversation with me typically have an interest for sure. The majority of those men have a secret or quiet desire to dress and bottom for a man like me.

So, in Second Life, it’s become a fun way to explore these desires and it turns out other men are very much into it as well. A totally pleasant surprise.

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Jan 22, 2013