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After posting a story that I KNEW people wouldn't even notice.....a half assed cry for help. (the only comments were those that I pointed it out to.....) I finally couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't take the internal struggle. The worthless feeling. The self loathing. I can't...I couldn't...I WON'T. So I tried the old cut it out standby. doesn't make it go away. But it gives me that release. To let all the **** INSIDE finally be on the OUTSIDE.

All I wanted was to be held...with conversation....with words....with arms....with SOMETHING. I'm not mad...I didn't expect much else....I just I'm nothing.

I'm nothing......

luckypickle luckypickle
10 Responses Jul 16, 2010

You DO. You just don't want to see how wonderful you are.

You never could sis. Never ever.

I'm sure there are and never said I had it worse than anyone.

i wish i could cry. put it so well FB1997....*hugs*

Your not the only one to feel this way.I felt like a nothing a few nights ago,if it wernt for chatting with a friend online i dont know what i might have done.You can read about it on my blog.The short of it is i was blocked by someone i thought was a friend.Worthless?Nothing?yeah,thats how i felt,i even cut like you did that night.It looks like you have friends here on ep,just as i do.I think we both have to remember that.

I love you too FB.

I love you guys...

You're something to me love, something very special and wonderful. *squeezes tight*

You didn't do anything to be sorry for. *hugs close*