My Friend Is Gone...

i found out a couple of days ago that my best friend from kindrgarden to now was murdered by her bf....ii feel so angry and hurt i cant eat i have nightmares all night so i am not sleeping an dthe way he did makes the nighmares worse i dont know how to get over this ...i dont want to be alone and it scares me he strangled and beat her to death an dthen threw her i the lake they didint find her for 2 days s o now i cant bathe by myself because of the water i cant look in the mirrow at my self i cant eat i am sick all the time .....dont know hwta to do
deannalovesgaige deannalovesgaige
26-30, F
1 Response Jan 20, 2013

Wow- that's intense. I haven't had anything like that happen to me, but here are some ideas that came to mind that might help:
For trouble eating: eat while doing something else, talking to family/friends, watching TV/movie, computer, something. If you really can't eat, drink Ensure. It'll help some.
For water: I've known a few people who had trouble with showering/bathing because of things that had happened. One thing that helped a lot of them was to listen to music while in the shower/bath. Obviously you have to be really careful when doing this so you don't get electrocuted, but it seemed to help them a lot.
As for the emotional pain. . . that's a lot harder. I would talk to a therapist about it. I'm not a believer in time heals all, but time does make things easier. You just have to get through this moment. In a way, it's all that exists. thinking that way helps me sometimes, especially when I feel like cutting.

i am able to shower...but bathe i cant because i have associated it with her being in the water we only have bath so hubby bout one of those attachable shower nozzles so it helped alot ...i drink alot daily but cant seem to eat alot i do talk to a therapist but it doesnt help it is hard to express my real,raw expressions face to face cause i fear being judged but i do understand what u are saying and i really appreciate u taking time to read and resond..it has helped know that someone has seen my feelings and that i have been heard

Raw feelings are tough. . . could you write them down and let her read them? That's what I have to do. If you don't think you can stand watching her read them, maybe ask if you can email them.

to who?

Your therapist

oh lol i see him 1 time a week

write your feelings and press the send button, that way you don't have to keep thinking about it gone. This helps my friend alot! Now she has to read what she wrote back to the therapist and although difficult is helping as she finds it too difficult to put into words what happened. Later it catches up with her and she crys but as I always tell her, nobody ever died from crying and it must hurt like hell but tears bring healing too. I feel for you and wish you everything of the best in your healing journey.

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