I Want to Be Happy ...but My Mom's Illness Won't Let Me
My mom has paranoid schizophrenia...no its not like how they portray schizophrenia on TV. She creates connections where there aren't any. She is the center of her delusion. When I was growing up no one explained to me what was wrong. I saw my mom lose her friends and 2 husbands both of which were losers. her disease has destroyed every relationship she has. I fear the feeble relationship that exists between us is next. I know Iknow she 's my mother, but you all don't know the mental abuse I have suffered. She is narcissistic nice for a while and draws you in and then she whispers her madness and then she degrades and put you down if your don't buy into her delusions. Now she's in the hospital and her rent needs to be paid. I don't know how I am going to convince the back to seen a check to thee apartment people without her there at the bank. I know you are thinking I should have power of attorney, get family to help...well no one in my family gives a damn, I am all she has left. She called me from the hospital Thursday talking that crazy paranoid crap...i can't take it I feel like I am going to break down and scream. I got clean up this mess she has made no one else will. I am so tired and broken. i cry all the time. I am tired of being unhappy. I am going to go to mass tomorrow and pray. I don't have anyone to talk to about this. My husband has been great, but I try not burden anyone. I can't seem to maintain any other relationships. At work I bury myself in my work and on my way to work I listen to books on CD to take my mind off my problems. I will take any advice I can get, because right now I feel like I just want to cut her lose and let the chips fall where they may.