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A time comes in your life when you finally get it. When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world through new eyes. This is your awakening.

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella (or vice versa) and that in the real world there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter). and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you, and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect, and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are and its OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself, and in the process a sense of newly found confidence is born of self-approval. You stop bitching and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that not everyone will always be there for you, and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance. You stop judging and pointing fingers, and you begin to accept people as they are, and to over look their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself, and the world around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. And you begin to sift through all the crap you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look, how much you shouldn't weigh, what you should wear, where you should shop, what you should drive, how and where you should live, what you should do for a living, who you should sleep with, who you should marry, what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children, or what you owe your parents.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for. You learn the difference between wanting and needing, and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with, and in the process you learn to go with your instincts. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility, and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry, and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love: Romantic love and familial love, How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable, or important because of the man or woman on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations, and outcomes. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love. and you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms just to make you happy. And, you learn that 'alone' does not mean lonely. And you look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up."

You also stop working so hard at putting feelings aside, smoothing things over, and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK. . . and that it is your right to want things that you want. and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands. You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, and respect, and you will not settle for less. And you allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, to glorify you with his or her touch. and in the process you internalize the meaning of self-respect. You learn that, for the most part, in life you get what you believe you deserve. and that much of life is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for, and that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success, you need direction, discipline, and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and its OK to risk asking for help.

You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time: FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it, and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve, and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions you learn not to personalize things.

You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers. It's just life happening. And you learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy, and resentment must be understood and redirected, or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls. You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself. by yourself, and you try to make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart's desire. And you hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side, you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can. Sometimes we lose sight of what's important in life. Sometimes we get bored of being children, and rush to grow up, and then long to be children again. Sometimes we lose our health to make money and then lose our money to restore our health. That by thinking anxiously about the future, we forget the present, such that we live neither for the present nor the future. Sometimes we live as if we will never die, and we die as if we had never lived We need to learn that what is most valuable is not what we have in our lives, but who we have in our lives. To learn that a rich person is not one who has the most, but is one who needs the least. To learn that true happiness is not to achieve our goals but to learn who we are through striving towards them. To learn that happiness is a decision. We can decide to be happy with what we are and what we have, or die from envy and jealousy of what we lack…


clowcri clowcri 22-25, F 71 Responses Apr 13, 2009

Your Response


Very insightful!!! So much wisdom at an early age. All I have to add is that once you learn to be at peace and love yourself, there are no limits to what you can have and achieve as long as you do it the "right" way. Follow God's one simple rule...don't do harm to yourself or anyone else. The best part of all this is that when you do get to this peace and happiness within, you won't need much to stay that way and anything else you achieve is just icing on the cake. Good luck on your journey. You will go far.

i really falling love with this writting!

Too long didnt read....... Hahahaha jk.

That was wonderful and I really needed all of it, just now.

I feel like I have walked in your shoes. It is crazy to me how much I can relate to this my life right now. Thank you thank you so much. This is so insperacional. Beautiful writing!!

That was awesome bra! It speaks to me, well done

Clearly, you've learned a lot :)

Yes and only if we could remember all that.

Loved your sharing of this! I would say it's the journey of wisdom and what we all aspire to experience and keep within us.

Yes, someone who wants to enjoy life and put it in a proffessional way

Yes, someone who wants to enjoy life and put it in a proffessional way

the awakening of another human being<br />
welcome young one<br />
well done

This is the best single piece that I have ever read.

It's true! This is how it is for the most part. Just "woke up" so to speak.


Isn't this from a self-fulfilling or self/help book? I think I have read this before. If so, can you give me the name of the book again? Phenomenal.

nicely done... love it!

I absolutely love everything you said. I have just experienced a similar awakening, and you've described it perfectly. It certainly hasn't been easy but I am so grateful for it. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. Best of luck on your journey.

THANK YOU!!! You just took a whole bunch of thoughts and ideas that have been floating around in my mind and wrote them down in a coherent, presentable form so I could see them better.

THANK YOU!!! You just took a whole bunch of thoughts and ideas that have been floating around in my mind and wrote them down in a coherent, presentable form so I could see them better.

that brought tears to my eyes . rings so true for me. but ive thought bout alot those things and have not been able to overcome it. yet people around me would never believe how i think inside

that brought tears to my eyes . rings so true for me. but ive thought bout alot those things and have not been able to overcome it. yet people around me would never believe how i think inside

Its so incredible....

thumbs up

Gives us alot to think about. Very inspiring. Thank you :)

I'm impressed with the wisdom coming from one so young ! <br />
Very well expressed - thank you.

Wonderful writing, powerful and empowering, making u want more and more of your way of thinking.<br />
i like the way you define the world and solve existance jig-saw.<br />
Awakening manifesto.<br />
Discovering god(ess) in oneself.<br />

That's so so beautiful. i have just joined ep few minutes ago and then i found ur beautiful reflection on LIFE. thank you so much for that. <br />

'Just amazing",<br />
if i was to read this earlier in my time.<br />
I would have not truly understood your terms. <br />
This moment now I have and am experiencing all that you have mentioned. But it's fear that sometimes still creep in. <br />
I'm not quite there yet, very close though..

You really amaze me Most people only learn a small percent of what you just said.. Lots of us that finally figure it all out are too old for it to matter!! I am really impressed with your writing. How did you learn such wisdom

I have read many poems,stories and listened to peoples personal testimonies that would make you cry. This is the first and only story I've read since joining this group,I must say I was brought back to reality, each & every word you wrote is on the money!!!! I thank you, for so telling it like it is!!


WOW...again....WOW....that my friend is a very insightful and inspirational store. I hope to come to a realization of my own like that some day.


Wow. Thank you for this gift! I plan to post this on the wall of my bedroom.

Wow, how old are you again? I am just coming to grips with this reality in my 40s. Very well said and thought out!

Here's a short story in a book named Bones<br />
<br />
I'm standing here not feeling alright I'm not just going to stop being angry I am standing here slowly losing my need to feel alright not only am I going to stand here looking angry I'm going to stand here looking angry at you unhappy serious and mad (looking down at him) why should I stand here angry and aware that your the reason why I can't take it anymore get your coat and lets take a walk there is nothing I would benefit from if I put up with this crap why don't you get that little rump of yours back in that room and pick up that mess (he stands shaking and nervous about what he's being told) look around and find what's out of place that belongs there "That doesn't," well pick it up I will (while his lip is hanging; unhappy facial ex<x>pression) that should do it Well if that'll do it what's that over there a (studdaring) ppick it up He hits him on the arm so hard it swells his hearing also starts to go bad) Heavily breathing now give me a big smile so that I know that your alright (no responce) smile or I'll whip you did you here me? stop acting like your death or I'll kill you. (strong breathing standing upset strong and confident) You have to do what I tell you stop or I'll (lundges into him and starts to beat him to death) do you hear me now? still no answer stupid as (can't find the word to describe it) just another sucker. He's not looking Ii don't know what's wrong with him (wondering, but thinking it's unimportant, standing staring) fear begins to weigh on his chest (he can hardly speak) "walk over there," why aren't you getting up (worried) stop faking fills weight on his heart) wake up (rocking him) I'm serious stop laying there I'm gonna (covers him out of sight and smothers al of the light until you see him dragging the bodyy out of the cloak room and into the hall down the stairs and then out of the building towards the garden area where there is cement) -- ties him up and buries him in the yard.

I am now learning to be content with my life after reading this.

i was just so upset about my soldier, and i read this and it made me feel at one with myself. thank you so much for taking the time to type this!

It must be a "woman-thing" undoubtedly a failure on my part, as what I got out of it was quite poetic but seemed to go nowhere

there are no words....beautiful

This was a wonderful story!!! I absolutely loved it!!! If only everyone could grasp such a concept, the world would be such a better place.....:)

That was absolutely beautiful! So glad I found your story. It came just when I needed it. It is one I will re-read regularly. Thanks so much for sharing such inspirational words!

Your wisdom is greatly appreciated. Finding this site was trully a blessing..

Wow. I'm bookmarking this page.

Yep, the only apparent paradox is it speaks of a moment of awakening, while debunking the very idea of happiness revealed , of magic, so in a way it still borrows from what it strays away from...

This is perfect for what I'm going through right now.

This is perfect for what I'm going through right now.

Wow! I loved your story, very inspiring. Would love to read more.

agreed, Clowcri has scribed this well. For some of us, we reach that kind of epiphany eventually; and some people never seem to get there. I am not sure why our parents/teachers/society pollutes our minds with so much information as we are growing up. I suppose that there are some gifted parents that help their kids better prepare for this awakening experience. But for me, it was freaky moment as I tried to digest the magnitude of things. My family must have thought I was high on pot (however I have never done drugs). I am not judgemental about drugs; just never did it.

Thank you for sharing such wise words, this is where I am hopefully heading.. nice to see others are heading there too. Wonderful.

Thank you for reminding me of this lovely inspirational poem. I was disappointed to see Sonny Carroll's website gone but "The Awakening" remains one of the most inspirational pieces written. Thank you again for sharing it. All the best.

Great story, I always get so down about what has happened or what people think and stuff of that nature. I have learned to never expect anything thats for sure. Its easier said that done but in the end you just have to be you and let go of the past. I can tell you put a lot of thought into what u said, thats for sharing.

I could not help but think that if you are only 20-25, you must have been around many times to have gained so rich an understanding of this life we lead. <br />
I commend you on a wonderfully written piece!

One of the most beautiful things I have read ... life changing.

Thank you so much for this story. Very well said, and very true. Continue to be a beautiful person, as you obviously are.

I'd love to make a point to read this every morning.

Wow very well writen, its funny you write about finding that point in life, and as you read it you feel like this is that point haha pretty cool stuff.

Wow, very well said! That is the type of life for which I want to strive!

Bravo! Couldn't say it better myself!

Good insights, reflective of inner peace and acceptance. I enjoy how this author speaks to the reader, too, by phrasing this in a second person narrative. Between the lines, I read lots of long-term soul-searching, wrestling demons, and arguing with one's inner voice-- Oh, wait! Those are my demons, the Muse, and internal editor squabbling again. Gotta go. Thanks for the wonderful read.

Thank you for that. About three weeks ago, in one week, I had my wisdom teeth taken out, found out my husband has been cheating on me for five months, and that the baby I'm pregnant with has something wrong with him. I just wanted to say thank you for your story because at a time like this I feel like I don't know what to do or what I want but reading that makes me want that. Thats what I want my life to be like and thats what I'll work for. You never know when you might change someones life.

Very well said. Really enjoyed reading. Thanks

wow-im speechless

I have recently come to these conclusions. It pleases me to know there are others who are ready to just enjoy life.

Great story, great insights. Sounds like you are well on your way :)

Excellent, I love it, I want to read more like this.

this is a fantastic story- good job

I am speechless. I am agree with Shine, this is one of the best stories i have read on EP. Thank you very much you sharing and wake our awareness up.<br />

Very well said. I enjoyed this greatly.

Wow .. LOVE this story!