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Lesson

I want to give you the world.
So you can be all that you can be.
I can.
I thought.
But
I can't teach you happiness unless I am happy myself.
I can't teach you how to be a good friend unless I spend time being one.
I can't teach you responsibility unless I hold myself accountable for my own actions.
Maybe some sense of fairness needs to be born from inequality.
Or righteousness from knowing lies.
Or justice from unjust situations.
But you don't see with adult eyes
Someday you will.
Someday you will know that conversation can have meaning or be just a word.
Confidence can be mustered or just a word.
Fear can be all consuming or just a word.
Love.
Love can be found, nurtured, lost, respected, gained, cherished.
Love can be everything.
Or just a word.

There is something I can teach you.
I can teach you forgiveness.
Please forgive me.
geetar39 geetar39 46-50, M 34 Responses Jul 19, 2011

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Forgiveness, it comes in all shapes and sizes. Each form beautiful in its existence.

Thank you for posting this.

Hi Hannah! Thanks for reading and commenting. How ya been?

I have been good, geetar. What have you been up to?

Love this <3 Very well written! brought tears to my eyes which is hard to do :) good job friend

Hi WMR. Thanks for the comment. Glad you liked it.

This is very poignant and well said. Given your mind holds these thoughts I feel certain your heart will lead it in the right direction in all the lessons you teach.

You could be right. Hopefully history writes a favorable review. Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment. Cheers

I've lost count how many times I keep coming back to read this poem. It inspires me. I hope one day you give your kids this beautiful poem.

*Shyly kicks at pebbles*

Smiling...... beaming at Geetar!! :)

I hope it's a tractor beam!

This was such a thoughtful read...and it was the perfect day to read it. Thanks very much for sharing. :)

You are appreciated, respected father to Your kid/s.
Wishes ensealed herein.
__/|__

Thanks for reading Mejj and for the wishes. Cheers

this story has completely changed me!

The peace of children in their bed

Denies the fears in their fathers head



He must provide he must not fail

His children must through their lives sail



It's up to him to pave the way

His deepest thoughts he can't convey



For deep within a fathers mind

Despite his efforts to be kind



Are doubts and fears beyond compare

For his little children sleeping there



They'll never know how hard it's been

To protect them from the unforeseen



Their lives will leave them unaware

Of the stress involved in a fathers care



Of his sleepless nights his constant fears

Of his powerful love and joyful tears



As he watched them sleeping safe and sound

With no one to threaten or their lives confound



As they grow and develop and each achieves

He carefully informs but never deceives



These two will remain intact and complete

Their dad won't let evil ever defeat



The care and protection he's there to provide

No one can push a real father aside



But as they do his children will grow

And the lives he provides will never show



How hard he tried against impossible odds

To spare their backs from life's painful rods



In their ignorance his children will most likely condemn

The enormous efforts he’s made for them



For how can they know a life different to theirs?

Unless one of them actually looks and compares



Their father’s pathway and his life

Before he made their Mother his wife



The children came first from then you see

There's no room for selfish in his family



By hook or by crook their dreams all came true

Their father kept working he knew what to do



His children will never be living his life

Trying so hard for their husband or wife



Life must be different for his children you see

"I don't want my children living like me"



It must be accepted sometimes kids fall

That's when a father needs only a call



Always there to lend a hand

Making a cubby or playing with sand



A joyful, carefree, happy life

That's all he wants for his children and wife.



Yet here he sits alone and confused

His efforts all wasted completely abused



No one comes near yet he's done no wrong

What are they thinking, he's been so strong



Look at their lives can't any of them see

Without his efforts where they might be



They’ve never cleaned toilets or loaded a truck

None of them have ever been down on their luck



All they’ve known has been only the best

Because their father didn't stop to rest



He just kept going, believing they cared

Now they're hiding or running scared



But scared of what he wonders aloud

He looks back at his life and can only be proud



He did his best they can't deny that

Most other people are dipping their hat



To a man who gave more than many others

He put them all first couldn't have his druthers



Now they all live their comfortable lives

Let’s hope their children, husbands, and wives



Never give them the same bitterness and hate

After such a great effort as a parent and mate



Things taken for granted not actually seen

No one knows where his strong back has been



Sometimes the very best of care

Can see you alone, just standing there



Wondering why you no longer see

A single member of your family

You Sir are a very gifted person in the art of using words. I am not sure who the real me is. I know who I think I am. You See its my opinion that the vast majority of children end up being the product of activities associated with human relationships, and not the primary goal in that activity. I grew up the oldest of 5 children. My father physically beat me to the point I now Have a serious case of PTSD. My mother never acknowledged it took place let alone stop him. Neither of my parents touched me except for my fathers beatings. My father made me responsible for my brothers behavior with out any authority. The beatings I received left me wetting my pants uncontrollably and petrified where I felt I was going to die. I would be on the floor and my mother who was in the next room never looked to see if I was in fact still alive. My parents never gave me a single red cent in my entire life. If I hit one of my siblings I got a beating. I felt as though I grew up in a lions den where I had to stay one step ahead of the hungry lions all the time./ (24/7) if you will. They could get me hurt or killed, I was never sure if I would survive these beatings. Neither parent ever said they even liked me let alone love me ever. How they treated me said it all. I left to fight for my country in 1952 (Korean war) . I had little or nothing to do with my family after that. I said good by to my mother after my father died because she caused me tremendous pain her never having been a mother to me. She said nothing simply looked at me and I left. I didn't see her until she died some 22 years later. I had no parents in my life ever. I don't know who the real me is and never will, that's impossible. I do know that any children I bring into the world are the biggest responsibility I can have, everything else by comparison practically speaking, almost doesn't exist. Its my belief that making my children the best they can be realistically is a monumental responsibility. We are the product of our genes first and foremost, our environment secondly and lastly our soul. One thing I know above all else is the responsibility my children are, my charge. I also know people can inherit for up to seven generations the genes of their ancestry. All of the above would suggest I am not able to handle the job of child rearing. People vary all over the place when it comes down to bringing up their children. Some do simply to little and some to much. You can plug in all of the actions people use to fill in that line. With my background the subject of child rearing is very strong and to simplify that job for me I follow this simple rule, my responsibility is to make my child the best all around person he or she can be. Don't push them faster than they can run or they will fall down. You have to cultivate an environment where by they are qualified to fit and fill and in that process they will become the best they can achieve. I am all alone in this world and have been since I was around 7 years of age. I have been filled my anger like you cant believe. I was hurt physically and mentally to the breaking point. I wouldn't hurt a flee........ A different perspective I offer. Some were killed, some killed them selves because of the destruction and some don't know what to do. Its not a simple matter. Thank you very much for listening to me.

You offer some wise words yourself. Thankyou for your post. As you suggest, as parents there is a lot we must consider. "In spite of" or "because of" are demons we must face.I wrote this but I still don't know what the hell I'm doing.

Thank you for responding to my airing my thoughts and feelings. I would suggest for someone who does't know what the hell your doing you have acquired a following that thinks what your doing is very moving and inspirational. Please don't stop but by all means continue with whatever motivates you. You will continue to move people in the proper direction with a very high degree of enthusiasm. There are not many of you around sir so please continue just as you are. I don't move very easy given my past and you moved me a great deal. Thank you very much for communicating with me.

You are welcome and thanks for your comments. They made me think as well.

@ jjgavinjr
Your words strike a chord and they do make sense. One has to understand ones responsibility as a Parent first.
Be well.
Prayers.

1 More Response

All so true. A wise man once said " Be the change you want to see in the world"

We can`t change the whole world, all we can change ( with a lot of effort and the desire ) is ourselves.

This is beautiful. I'm sending it to a friend who stresses so much over raising his son, the right way, in THIS world. Protecting him. That is his main thing - protecting his wife and his son. The child is 5; my friend is an Master Sergeant in the Army who is 46 and the events of 9/11 and after, and his deployment, have made him hyper-vigilant. He gotten help, especially as he married and then had his son, but I think this wonderful writing of yours will give him some perspective about how good a father he already is!



When I was being raised (I am 55 next week) raising of children was different. My Catholic parents had 7 children within 10 years. As we grew up, mostly with the help of one another as my mother was an alcoholic (though she did not drink daily or even monthly - just when something caused her to drink), and started our own homes, we used to say of my mother and father that "they made the best decisions they could at the time, and with the info that they had available to them."



I've come to know that much of this statement is just a reassurance for us kids, and some of it is to exonerate my parents, who are now deceased. It is/was used to forgive or perhaps forget. But even before the Betty Ford clinic, there were things that could have been done to help my mom and therefore help us children. They had the financial resources, but they also had a "name" to protect. Damn it anyway, as we children were those who needed protection, not the family name!



I have forgiven my parents for their shortcomings in raising me. I did so for me. They no longer need my forgiveness. And they did a wonderful job in so many respects. I didn't understand the entire situation, even when my mother died 5 years ago (oh do things come out of the woodwork once they are both gone!), to NOT forgive her, it was just what I did - because "they made the best decisions they could at the time, and with the info that they had available to them."



I do not have children, but I'm not relying on "they made the best decisions they could at the time, and with the info that they had available to them." I hope my siblings are not. There is, of course, some truth to the statement. But it can also be a cop-out.



Anyway, thank you so much for writing this and then sharing it. It speaks to reality instead of excuses. These things can be accomplished. We can raise our children well.





Children do learn what they live....

I really enjoyed this.

It echoes how I feel,

and it is just so beautifully expressed.

I have children i love, and they are so cut off and resistant to me that they arnt really my kids cuz i cant do those things for them.

Awesome reality expressed in few words just learn and learn!!!

very nice

Nice :-)

I love this.... Thanks for pointing it out to me EP...... Truly inspirational... and I shall print a copy off for my noticeboard If thats ok....



Thankyou for sharing it with us xx

This is powerful and inspiring truth if you make sure your son gets to read it someday.

Go geetar. you got one of the most inspirational stories of the year!

I wish my brother could have written this

"I can't teach you happiness unless I am happy myself"

This is the hardest lesson to ever teach your children and yourself.



And if we ask for forgiveness, let us first forgive ourselves. Has to come from us before we can extend.



Love this post, Gee... straight from the heart... *tears* Got a Kleenex?

Bluebie, WildOrchid, Snowberry thanks.

I am naturally contemplative and it is hard not to be aware of the eyes on me looking for reassurance and guidance but rarely asking for it directly - just needing it.

Your welcome and its that awareness that leads us to do the best we can as parents. Its a good thing to be aware and question your own value as a parent.

you speak truth in so simple words.Admirable for a man and a great dad.

Very moving words and as a parent I know how strong these words are......My girls are in their early teens and I have done the best that I can do as a Mom to lead by example but I have made my mistakes as well. We are very close that leads me to believe that I have taught them forgiveness as well. As a Mom of teens you begin to realize that the only thing left to do is to live by example and guide them through their mistakes and triumphs and hope for the best. But the foundation has already been created at this point. Thanks for sharing this.

the last paragraph shook me. thanks for sharing such lesson which was molded into phrases.

This is amazing, Geetar, what you have captured here is the essence of parenthood. Hugs.

If teaching is more about creating the "opportunity" to learn then I will have done a great job with forgiveness. You are right though and I like your view that true forgiveness is rare and very very hard to do.

Awww...how touching!!

nice one

Thanks all.

Mari what a wonderful sentiment. Thanks and enjoy your new son!

I read this to my fiance, as we are about to become parents for the first time and it made him smile, but more importantly it made him think. He's about to become a father to a first born son and there is so much room for error, but to teach by example is the best (and most eloquently worded) advice we have ever gotten.