A Fighter Remains A Fighter

I had a very harsh childhood. My parents had a big family...six daughters and a youngest son. I. being younger to the eldest, was the most neglected. I could never understand why my father never liked me and treated me very badly. I always liked to be alone and be with myself and do my own things. When i grew up, came the love marriage, followed by a divorce, which was again a shock to my traditional Indian family. But i went ahead with the divorce as i didn't want to spend my life unhappily. Then came the struggle part. Being divorced at the age of 26, with a three and half years old daughter, life wasn't easy. I had no idea what i was going to do. Emotionally, i was a weak person. I fell in love again miserably with a friend of mine. It was a very intense affair for two and half years. Then came the shock. My boy friend got married, without even telling me. The news shook me very badly. That was the point where i felt like committing suicide. The only thing which kept me away from this was...my daughter. I could imagine my littel daughter weeping bitterly over my dead body. I couldn't bear that. I kept crying for more than two and half years. I think i became even mentally imbalanced. That was a very tough and hard period of my life. I couldn't leave my boyfriend even after his marriage and even he was very concerned and couldn't see me in pain. He was always there to take care of me. Even he went through a hell because of me. We were living in the same city and meeting often. Then i got a job somewhere else and i left that place. After that i started becoming normal. Then i decided to leave him forever. It was a good decision.

My boy friend wasn't a bad person. He could have always left me after his marriage but he didn't. The day i decided to leave him, he appreciated my decision. Even now we do speak on the phone and i know as and when i need him, he will be there as a good friend.

When i looked back somehow i could never understand what he did to me. But now the kind of life i have been living, i thank him for not marrying me.

My life has suddenly taken a different turn. I am able to do what has been my passion since childhood. I am into motor-biking business. I am the first Indian woman professional in this area and i am thoroughly enjoying it. Now i realize that i was never a family kind of person. I like to live my life the way i want. I always longed for total freedom. Now i thank God and i strongly believe that whatever happens in life, happens for the best. I feel my life has just started and i have a long way to go. Life is so exciting now and there is not any element of insecurity. MY daughter is grown up and is self dependent. Daughters are blessings. I feel so happy and satisfied. I will be 48 years young this year and i feel like a teenager..wow..great feeling.

moksha18 moksha18
51-55, F
7 Responses May 10, 2010

" I could imagine my littel daughter weeping bitterly over my dead body"

You say that as if she would have cared.....lol


You got a job like a normal person....WOW! That totally makes you a fighter! Oh please! You need to get real! You didn't do crap out of the ordinary.

The fact that you are happy with your life now is the most important thing.What has happened in your past has led you where you are now and you appear to be blessed as you are not torn apart by regrets and have your life as you want it to be.

Thanks again. I do feel His presence around me. Believe me i do have many problems like everyone of us, but they get solved on their own. It is amazing how He takes care of His people. Day and night i thank Him.

You are truly blessed and also a blessing to others.GOD will always bless us with wisdom and discernment to guide us through our journey on this earth and in return we must be grateful by serving mankind as he created us to do.He will sent his angels into our lives as soulmates at the most appropriate time.

Thanks for all your lovely comments. I thankful to God for his graciousness. There is nobody like me in my family as they havn't seen what invaluable experiences i had in my life. If God gave me a tough life, He gave me the strength also to face it boldly. I am truly blessed.

I am inspired by your courage and firmly believing the sufferings were good for you.Thats how i call it as God's lessions for me and as a fighter i am able to pass the test and became an overcomer.