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Shot Down

I'm gay, and I liked this guy at my school, Tom.  I'm not completely out yet, i haven't told my parents, but a lot of people know.  He was really nice to me, and we had fun telling jokes to each other.  I thought it was kind of like "meant to be."  I told my friend about him, and she told me to talk to him.  The very next day, Tom and I run into each other.  We started texting, and the next day, I told him i was gay and asked if he was.  He got really mad at me and said that he wasn't (btw, everyone knows he is cuz he's done stuff with guys before).  He said "f uck off, homo," "you're a f aggot,"  "get a life, q ueer,"  and "go get hit by a car."  I never felt worse than i did for the next couple days.  I'm hoping that the reason he got mad was just because he's scared to admit to anyone who he is.  The other day, my friend told me that Tom told her he was bi.  Now i don't know if i should feel happy that he's coming out or sad because he still hasn't told me he is.  nor has he apologized.  I don't know what to think.  I really want him to be the guy i started to like.  Whenever I see him in school, my heart stops, and I can tell he avoids me...kind of like he's afraid of me or something.  I've never been kissed (by either sex), and i really wanted Tom to be my first kiss.  What should I do?
pendragon0072 pendragon0072 18-21, M 6 Responses Sep 25, 2011

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Make him jealous. Talk to other guys, be happy, act like it never happened, and ignore him until he try's to talk to you. But this is only if he likes you or it will make him like you by seeing you in a different light.

add me ;)

good comments so far. the gay male community is one of the strangest you will try to navigate. logic and rationality often go out the window. maybe for some it's a product of hiding who you are and lying about yourself to the world. don't ever hang too much importance on any one person, you will be disappointed quite often. always have an open mind about who, what, and when ...

Oh guys..Guys are crazy..Make some friends online to keep in touch with... (Guys that aren't looking for skin).<br />
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It's great to have gay friends that are just friends.<br />
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The problem here is he is either gay and in denial, or just an *******. :/<br />
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Good luck :)

1. have patience.<br />
2. if he never comes around, move on.<br />
I know this is difficult but you must think of yourself first in this situation.

after he said that to me i told him "I hope your attitude changes, and when it does, I've already forgiven you." I really do forgive him. There's just sooo many conflicting things that I feel every time i see him. normally i feel proud, then i feel angry, then i feel extremely sad. My heart falls apart every single time. This happened a couple months ago...AND two weeks ago i told my friend i was gay. Before i told her anything else, she said, "it's ok. Tom told me he was gay, too." i told her what happened with him and she told him she was very disappointed in him. He responded "He's not even my friend and he was trying to make me gay...and i'm not...and i'm not going to talk about it with you...its funny how this is the only time you've texted me and its about him...f uck off." TOM, JUST MAKE UP YOUR MIND, AND THEN TELL ME THE TRUTH!

1. have patience.<br />
2. if he never comes around, move on.<br />
I know this is difficult but you must think of yourself first in this situation.