Never Tought It Can Happen

i never tought that i will end up like this - or start , i dunno , but aniway , i love one girl ,
shes so nice , beautifull and i cant stop thinking obout her - lame , coz she is a girl for good sake.
first time i saw her in my school bus ( more than 2 fuuuuuc years )  , and there was that click in my hearth - and  we talked .......
anyway , it was showen that we have some same friends and almoust  all things in comon so  we started seeing eachother every day.
but i fealt more then a friendship .  so , i start avoiding her after few months - i will never forgive myself for that , but i had to do it.
i was afraid that i will do something lame , and that i couldnt hide it anymore - it was badly hidden already.
i watch her some time . and i left all "our"  friends - we just say hello sometimes  to eachother  and talk obout life - but not love , either i wanna know their stories , but they dont wanna tell me coz i dont tell them mine.
i couldnt talk to them obout this sh***+++++ššp , so when they asked me who i love i sayed noone , but i love her , and i couldnt tell that . they get angry coz they saw that i am in love .....
i have  friends , but i still cant talk obout it . cant belive what great friends i lost . what bad friend i was , left em coz of love.
every day i think obout her ,  and i cant yust be cool , when i see her (every fricking schoolday ) i wanna tell her all in her face , but i know she  hates me.
it is killin me when i hear that she is in bad mood for some jurks that i know so i wanna revenge so it looks like i atack them (verbaly) with no reason at all.
i am so dum.
aniway , i am hideing in music and i started to play call of duty  - i tought that i will  never play  , but that is my way out.
i write some poems - they are not all obout her  , but i dedicated every single one to her.

and for the record , i use to love boys . now , i dont give a damn obout  boys n i dont like gurls , i just love one girl and thats it . and  it may hurts , but i dont wanna stop.

jumpnsmash jumpnsmash
18-21, F
2 Responses Jul 23, 2010

howww cute you love her go to her tell her why u avoided her she should understand

you have to tell her the truth <br />
tell your exfriends the truth <br />
if they are your true friends they will accept you .<br />
i did the same thing<br />
im still tryin to get the courage to go and tell her why i did what i did<br />
she loves or loved me too<br />
and i ended our friend ship when we about to go out cuz i was afraid of my parents findin out<br />
it was stupid and i regret it .