Im So Inlove With Her!
I have been in love with my bestfriend for the last 2 years and even writing it down makkes me feel stupid.She keeps asking me why i dont have a boyfriend but the truth is when i m with a guy.I think about her.I go having a good time and i start wishing she was right there with me.She has a boyfriend.And she told me that she is completely inlove with him.I know we can never be,That much i know.But how do I move on,We r in different states but all i do is think about her.She keeps telling me to move back and that she needs me but i cnt move back because of my job.God,i feel like i lost her.Sometimes i feel like my heart is about to pop out of my chest.Im dying slowly.I keep asking God to help me get over her coz it hurts.How does this happen? love someone who does not give a **** about you!If i could afford therapy,i would go.We used to be so close.I cant even tell you the last time.We said i love you to each other.She used to say it to me all the time and when i did not say it back.she would feel hurt and ask me weather i dont love her.I wish she knew how much i love her.When we goo out with her boyfriend,i try not to look at her because Iam afraid he might notice how much i care about her.I try to keep the touching to a minimum if not zero.Iam completely in love with her.One time we were watching a movie and i was drunk and she was sober..and she started brushing my hair off my fore head and then she gave me her hand and she told me to hold on to it.it was one of my best times with her.and i keep playing back to that night.and there is a time we were drunk and she was horny.And she said: some random dude better get here before i start making out with my bestfriend!"Before her current boyfriend,we could talk at 4am in the morning,she used to wake up and text me but now i feel so left out!!IM hurting.I cnt tell her.she will never speak to me again!!