But I Have A Bf.. :/This will be a long one.
I ask you to not judge and do NOT give me advice (like break up w/ bf etc.)
So let's call her E.
E is my first biggest real completely real girl crush.
I really like her. I desire her.
The first day I saw her, I didn't think it was a crush, well it grew into a crush. Literally After my first week of seeing her on my bus everyday and staring at the back of her head I realized that this wasn't any normal human interest..
When I confessed to myself that this had to be a crush, she got a boyfriend. That stopped nothing. I started to like her more and more. Let's call E's bf Edwardo. Well ex bf. They went out for about two and a half months. I never really got to know her or spoke to her while she was with him. I only complimented her on her shirt :). Anyway I would hate the way Edwardo treated E she deserved so much better.. Seeing him so kissy w/ her when she just wanted a sweet goodbye kiss (I read her body language) was upsetting for me. It made me want her more... Idk why they broke up but I saw her in the cafe w/ a friend of mine. I walked up to E and told her how great she looked dancing for this talent show. She said thanks and did her cute smile. We are now on our way to being friends. I've never ever wanted a girl like this... She's a catch too because she's one of those great girls all the guys want and all the girls want to be friends with. So I say hi to her everyday now and follow her on my way to one of my classes. The other day while I was doing this, I said hey and we talked. I made her laugh and see that cute smile shine. Its hard cus I like her and I have a bf. I want my bf but he is a different want. E is so muchmore than him and I just wish she was mine. That her and I could eat lunch together. That I could hold hands with her and walk her to her bus, and sweetly kiss her goodbye like she would like.
Only one person knows about her, a very great friend I talk on the phone with that I met here.
E's my lovely secret.
I hold her, here.
In my heart, where her presence makes the beat pulse faster than the speed of light...