I'm a 20 year old blonde hair blue eyed boy who is dealing with depression.. Some say I'm shy, which I can be, sometimes anti social all together. But I made this thingy ( still not too sure how it works) for the sake of getting to know new people :)
StoneColdNipZz StoneColdNipZz
22-25, M
16 Responses Aug 28, 2014

I'm a 20 year old girl who HAD severe depression basically her whole life. I take medication. It still lingers in my life but nothing I can't eventually handle. I can not bare to hear that someone is depressed. I wouldn't wish it on my enemy. I hope everything works out for you and your loneliness subsides. If you need to talk, I will be here

Well, I'm a 48 year old mam. Struggle with depression. I have a young son who is going through the same struggle. He finds it very difficult to deal with any social setting. He has cut himself off from everyone and spends all his time in his room. Now, I know this sounds like 'alarm bells'. But then I remember myself when I was young. I don't think I spoke for about two years. I found any social setting so frightening that I just didn't go. People, old and young can not survive without contact with others. Even if it's just this, it's a start. I am new to this too. I needed to talk to someone. Anyway, all I can say is as I got older I realised that most of the people I met were equally as awkard as me but they just hid it better. Then as time passed I realised I was equally as good as them.....dare I say it......even 'funny' sometimes. Now that I am 48, it has taken a long journey to realise that everyone out there falls into a number of categories. 1. As frightened as you. 2. As shy or frightened as you but have found ways to hide it. 3. Are as thick as a brick and don't know they should just be quiet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sounds like you are really perspective about the world but just don't know how put your thoughts into action. I had the same problem just a month ago. I'm an older teen and us girls get judged by our weight all the time. I got depressed as I spiraled into an eating disorder. But now I'm learning that life is too short to mope over it. I had my grieving session so it's now time to show the world the wiser and better me. I hope you know that you are never alone in this but in the end, only you can be the one to really pull yourself together. Just keep thinking, the more you laugh the longer you'll live. My grandma kept reminding me that when I was down.
Keep on improving and never stop learning. Now I'm sound like a fortune cookie, sorry lol.

Hey StoneC, Sorry to hear your fighting Big D. That is a tough battle and it can be something that you have to do at times all through your life. Your age is tough too! Most guys your age are still trying to find out who they are and what they want to do in life. These can be a depressing questions to solve, especially if you have other things to battle.

Drop a note if you want to chat! Us guys need to stick together! GL Wild-D

Wow you've already been given some amazing advice and insight. I had to go through and read it all for myself because I'm in the same boat. And though I'm not exactly an introvert (my friends can't get me to shut up) I also have issues with opening up to people. I'm very good at faking happiness as much people suffering from depression are, and thus friends never get too close. So I admire you for finding this site and reaching out, being honest about your depression. You'll find some great people here :)
I don't know if you watch Ted Talks, but if you want you should look up "The Power of Introverts." it gives a new perspective on what being an introvert is and how today's society twists its view on personalities, enabling extroverts to get ahead while telling introverts they need to change.

great note Seven, your message oozes with positive energy which is just want he needs! Wild-D

I was very much the same, especially at your age after having had a terrible time at school and a lonely miserable home life to go with it. It took me many years to get over it, trying to get my head round things one bit at a time. The best thing I did was to get into the dance music scene - somewhere I finally found I could express myself and let go, surrounded by like-minded non-judgmental people.

I never thought I'd fully become who I wanted to be but this year something has really clicked into place and I feel wonderful. On top of that I've ended up with a lovely girlfriend and we're so into each other and love to try new things every day.

I've realised that the more positive you feel about yourself, the more opportunities present themselves - and grabbing these opportunities leads to feeling even better: sort of like the "downward spiral" of depression turned on its head. You're young and beautiful and you've got the whole world in front of you... go out and explore, little steps at a time, and you'll never look back!

That's nice, everyone deserves to be happy. However one must be careful not to expect all depressed people to be able to pull themselves out of it. I am not trying to say there is nothing people can do to help themself, because obviously they can.
But we have to consider why a person is depressed, not everyone is depressed for the same reasons or in the same ways. It could be an existential angst, or spiritual problem not readily understood and complicated by the busy modern age which leaves little room for the contemplative soul, but instead forces them into a competitive environment. One can just be in despair at the "state of the world" whether their own personal life is wonderful or not. Or perhaps a person finds it hard to handle living in an infinite universe that defeats any attempt at comprehension.
i think its counter-productive to believe that everyone can sort themselves out with some positivity. My whole life I have been tole to do this or do that to feel better, but the issue is to do with the human condition, and the schism between my inner life and the universe, no amount of exercise, or self-help classes is gonna shift that

You hit the nail on the head with the "competitive" bit. Today's world has been corrupted by obsessive competitiveness and it's trampling and subduing many a sensitive soul. My mantras are/were:

- I have nothing to prove; take me for who I am or walk away on good terms.

- Competitiveness is not necessary or even beneficial for onward and upward evolution - in fact, quite the contrary. Co-operation drives progress towards a kinder and more efficient world. (Why do schools and parents still encourage competitiveness?)

- Depression has many causes and, yes, many are external. However the external world is cyclical and bad changes to good given time. Once you're in phase with those cycles you're onto a winner.

In my experience drugs are a useful tool to beat depression. But not the prescription drugs supplied by a "one size fits all" healthcare system (these just turn people into emotionless zombies and I have a friend who was nearly ruined by it - thankfully he discovered motorbikes and a new attitude to relationships and he's well on the up).

I am not suggesting or advocating that anybody should feel compelled to take drugs (it's a personal choice and not for everyone) but it worked for me. If this is the route you take, it is imperative to read, reasearch and understand them from a chemical, pharmacological and spiritual point of view rather than diving in blind. Drugs are not an escape route, nor should they be a way of blinding youself to the trials of life: however they can be a highly valued diagnostic and developmental tool.

I am an engineer and have come to the conclusion that NO problem is insurmountable - it's just a case of approaching it from multiple angles and taking your time.

You're strong minded and had the resolve to take life on on your own terms, I am not trying to suggest it was easy for you, but perhaps we have something in common that we are individualistic, I think for other people its much harder to swim against the tide, and when the tide seems so awful they don't know what to do

"And when the tide seems so awful they don't know what to do"

A good starting point (if not already done): switch off the TV, cancel the licence/subscriptions and sell it. Bin the newspapers. The things and people who matter are those who are close to you and want to share your world. The rest is just a soap opera designed to keep good people down.

"damn right!" as Dr Gonzo would say.
Ever watch Rab C. Nesbitt? His "Ne'er let the bastads git ya doon" is an attitude many of todays underclass could do with a bit of

but of course I had to switch the tv on to watch that stuff

So what, if I may ask...has u depressed? What's got u the sads? What's ur struggle? What's ur fear?

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It's all good... The virtual world is much more fun then reality... and I'm more of an introvert as well... I'm a nerd :D

nerds rule!

Amen to that!

I agree also

I totally agree

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You're an introvert.. there's more of us out there than you think. It's not a bad thing.. I deal with depression, anxiety, but I remind myself what a miracle it is and how lucky I am to experience this life. If you want to make new friends, join a group, take classes.. don't depend on electronics tho. Actual face to face is better :)

Good luck, life is quite a ride, ups and downs, thrills spills and bellyaches, but it's the only life we know and it has some nice moments, be honest.
That's my advice to myself anyway to try and get through the day, I was 21 when I first experienced depression, I din't know what it was at the time, a strange feeling, I became aware of it later, and then the struggle began to live with it. But hey everyone has their cross to bear as the saying goes, and also I have heard it said that everyones road is tough, so we should try to be compassionate to others if we can for what they go through.
It's so easy easy to become self absorbed when one has depression, it's very enveloping (if that's even a word..? )
Hopefully you will meet some people on here that help you out, I also joined today so that's another thing we have in common

So your saying your a natzi

Haha no I'm not a nazi


Hey, if u ever wanna chat, feel free. I too love talking to new people =)

Thanks Hun! Same goes for u :)

Spend time experimenting with people... Don't worry too much about failure at your age... Because it's all just learning experiences

I get being shy. I can be that way sometimes too. I have to work very hard to let go of my inner shyness in order to find people that are of my same kind to be around. It is not always easy but always worthwhile. I find that doing the things that I truly love helps me connect with others too. Good luck Shy man.

Thank u :)

Well your among mostly good people that are willing to listen and help if you need it.

Thanks Hun :)

No problem, the world would be a better place if people help each other more

I like people who say hun. Just hearing it makes me feel hugged.

hello dear

Hi :)

Good for you. I'm sure you'll find lots of interesting people to chat to on here.

Thanks buddy