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I Am a Grieving Parent

It Hurts..

By: Caprisun
Written on June 17th, 2009

Someone told me that the pain will go away. I'm not sure if that's so. However, I do know that I miss my son so much. It's been 6 months now since Fhrahji has been gone. He was seven when he passed away. He was born with many birth defects. When the day came for me to say good bye, it felt like a bad dream.

I still cry. I miss him daily. No matter what he's still my baby.

By: Caprisun
Age: 31-35 , Female
1,658 people have read this story

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10 responses
  • Haleymyangelbaby
    Haleymyangelbaby

    I lost my baby girl almost 15 years ago and it still hurts as much now as it did then. Most of the time I feel alone.

    Apr 19
    1 like
  • ideasdreams
    ideasdreams

    i too miss my son, i know how you feel

    Jan 7
    1 like
  • Ladyrider63
    Ladyrider63

    I know how you feel, i just lost my son 2 months ago, I don't know how i am going to get through this, but i hear the pain gets softer and we let go slowly but never let go of them completly, how can we.

    Apr 30, 2012
    1 like
  • joie75
    joie75

    it has been 23 years for me and trust me the pain does lessen, we never ever forget our children, but over time the wounds do heal. So please take heart that someday you will feel better even if it doesn;t feel like it. At the beginning I never thought the time would come where the pain would subside, but eventually around year 16 it did so please take heart.

    Apr 25, 2012
    1 like
  • Downsdav
    Downsdav

    I lost my son 20 years ago. I cry for him less often, but i still hurt for him in my heart and soul. The pain will never go away, but you will learn to endure it and go on living.

    Oct 25, 2011
    2 likes
  • Caprisun
    Caprisun

    @Jaysbarn It's been almost three years now since the death of my son. I'm now okay with his death. I miss him still. However, taking care of him was never considered as being "heavy." He never lived a "heavy" life. He had a great life. Actually, he had a life better than some children who where born without birth defects. If I had to do it all over again I would.

    Jul 21, 2011
    1 like
    • anacapa123
      anacapa123

      I can relate to what you said about if you had to do it all over again, you would. My child was born severely handicapped and I feel the same way. I cared for her 24/7 but I'd do it again in a heartbeat if I could.

      May 13, 2012
      1 like
  • jaysbarn
    jaysbarn

    Grieving is a progressive experience.Fortunately it comes to most of us in a life time infrequently. I don't mean to sound insensitive, but a child with so many birth defects would have had a very heavy life.

    You would have had a heavy life taking care of such a child. Sometimes, things do happen for the best.

    I know this may seem an insensitive attitude, but I have seen grieving people go on being sad, because nobody dares tell them the truth. When someone does, it begins to dawn on them, I still have a future and lets go on from here, not yeasterday.

    Jul 21, 2011
    1 like
  • Caprisun
    Caprisun

    Thanks Mabob. It's about to be 3 years now. Looking back on this story, I can see how things have changed since I wrote it. I love my son more and more each day. The hurt is still there, but it's bareable now. :)

    Apr 21, 2011
    2 likes
  • mabob
    mabob

    The pain will stay but will change. It has been almost 5 years. The pain is less visceral and more contained inside of me.

    Apr 21, 2011
    3 likes