Here We Go Again

Everything is the lash of a whip. And my husband and younger son don't have a clue.I know perfectly well that if a delicate topic has come up (is our older son looking for a job yet? doing anything?)especially if its because my husband is asking about it, which means itching to have an alpha dog confrontation with SOMEbody...I know I need to find a peaceful inside place and walk gently, but again I didn't. It's not hard to do, and makes all the difference to both our sons, but I..forget? Don't make the effort? It's not like I'm being nasty or angry or anything, just marginally more irritated than usual, so he sees that and bingo, he's on it. Even then I could say calmly, sorry, no not thinking about son and job, but yeah, could have been nicer blah blah, but didnt do it. So everyone has a lousy morning, and I cant let it go...they hate it when I talk at all, and I talk to release my feelings and to desperately try for a response. And I know it doesnt work that way, and surely I can be bigger than that since all that matters is how my kids feel, but there I go again and it's because I can't detach myself and stop feeling everything so intensely. The air is thick with their annoyance or anger and I keep trying to beat it away, and that makes it so much worse. I dont want to lose that sensitivity since I feel beautiful things too, but I need help coping with the ugly things!

roisindhu roisindhu
46-50, F
1 Response Feb 11, 2009

You're ruminating! That's what we (HSP's) do... try to let it go