I Dont Know What I Am

This is going to sound weird, i don't know if im straight or a lesbian.  At the moment i have got a boyfriend and i have been with him for over two years, but im not happy with him. At first i was attracted to his best friend who is also a boy, but at the same time i am attracted to girls, not every girl, i would not walk past girls in the street and think god she is fit, but when i get friendly with a girl or meet someone that is ok i do start to have the sexual feeling towards them. I have never done anything with a girl but i would like to try it i think. All i want to do is live the conventional life where you marry have kids ect but i don't think that's me. Im so confussed i don't know what to do, it upsets me so much i cry myself to sleep, im not happy with my boyfriend but im to scared to do anything about it. any help would be great 

a very confussed girl
princesslyndsey princesslyndsey
18-21, F
6 Responses Jul 26, 2010

sounds like you have attractions to guys and girls, and as for the "conventional" life screw it do what makes YOU happy! :)

Hey I Hope some one could help me<br />
<br />
im 14 y'o girl<br />
andd im not sure if im a lesbain or not<br />
You see i Love boy's! like really love boy's and i have never ever had a crush on a girl LIKE NEVER<br />
but i always seem to end up watching lesbian **** and i love reading lesbian sex :/<br />
<br />
So what's up with me? ive never had a crush on a girl in my life if it wasn't for watching lesbian **** then the thought of me being a lesbian would of never crossed my mind because i love boys im tottlaly into Them! <br />
Help Soon!<br />
Out-- Debbie x

I am a young Les, Just came out of the "closet" so to speak. But when I was younger i dated men and even had sex with them because I was a foster Kid and my parents dont agree with the homosexual life style, I was so upset all the time and all i was doing was trying to make others happy. I had discoverd myself at the age 14 and still under the rath of adults and others. Im not going to tell you its going to be easy cause it us not, its a journey and you never really find out who you really are, thats an adventure life takes you on. But what I want you to know and it is really important is that your not alone we all go through this, and you need to just sit and think about what will make you happy and wheather its a man or woman, you will be okay if you need to talk im here.

Wety writting; my advise is, turn inwards and first discover yourself and find yourself, on your inward journey you will receive your answer as to with who you like to share your love with in partnership or relationship, on your journey know that the key is TRUST in all we experience. You will discover as you flow in motion what your sexuality is. I have been in hetro, gay relationships and on the age of 46 I experience that I like to share my love in partnership with a women! We step forward in trust, faith, courage. There is a benevolant aspect of the universe that steps with us! Just Do It! Go For It!

1 more advise might help you, in sex life you have to try each thing once, just once to activate or deactivate the things that might be (just you),it might be wierd to you to hear such thing, but its the truth, u cant know your own desire unless you tried it first,and you cant live with somebodies else experience., so why dont you try it first before you judge it or judge your self and sex life,. more info! contact me.

Sexuality is a tough thing to understand. I went through what you did, I had a boyfriend but found myself interested in other women. You have to be true to you and only you, that is the best advice anyone can give you. When people were telling me this I of course thought they needed to take a walk in my shoes before giving me that crappy advice...lol, really though that's what needs to be your focus...YOU! If this guy is truly NOT making you happy he needs to go, whether he's not right for you because he's a guy or for other reasons, that first step would let you breath a little more easily. From there take break from people if you wish or maybe find someone who fits you not for what gender they are but for who they are inside. While there are those who are "straight" or "gay" there are also those of us who just don't care. Don't let having feelings for women fool you into thinking your a "lesbian", on the same note don't let being into guys make you "straight". Labels have made life's decisions so much harder, especially for our age, we all think we have to fit in some category or be stamped by some brand...that's not the case. One thing to think about is just like a fingerprint every person's heart is different than anyone else's. No one can tell you who or what to love or how to do it. Don't let yourself fall into lesbian, gay, bi, trans, straight, black, white, brown, green, or yellow. I had the issues you did and realized that if I were to be single (I'm not) and found a girl I had feelings for, I'd be with her, if I found a guy I had feelings for, I'd be with him, don't let anyone judge or categorize you. Do what your heart says and accept and love everyone for their differences, the rest is your story to write...hope I could help! :)