Happy Endings Are Possible :-)

Hi my Fellow group friends. Its been a while since i've been on EP. I have read so many new stories since i wrote mine nearly 18 months ago. And i still feel every emotion that goes into your stories. A lot has happened since i posted my experience.

lets start at the beginning:
July 2010 i fell for a woman who worked with me, my fiance also worked with me. crazy i know. i had a on and off relationship with this woman, but also stayed engaged. so in dec 2010 i got married. I thought that by going to through with the wedding the feelings i had for this woman would dissapear and i was scared i would end up alone if cancelled the wedding. my family also put a lot pressure on me so i was scared of their opnion if i didnt go through with it. so the wedding happened, and to my dissapointed the feelings for the woman i had an affair with only got stronger. my marriage started out under pressure, we constantly fought and he verbally abused me. so as is expected when there is constant fighting, our sexual relationship dried up within 2 months after the wedding. the woman i had the affair with still talked to me and we had a "thing", it was hard, and painful. i felt so alone and had no one to talk to about it. thats when i found EP. I wrote my story. and for the first time in 2 years i felt like i wasnt alone, because there were so many other woman in the exact same position as i was.

i made lifelong friends on EP. One friend was always there, she lives in america and i live in south africa. we helped and supported each other. she encouraged me to be honest with my ex-husband. as i grew strenght from all the wonderful woman in this group. I finally got the courage to tell my ex-husband, he was sad,shocked and dissapointed, he cried and i cried. we spoke and he begged me to stay. i told him its not fair and i cant continue to live a lie. eventually he understood and we decided that divorce is the best way forward. so september 2011 we filed for divorce.

i was sad, but i also felt free. i moved out of the house that he and i owned together. in october 2011 the woman who i had feelings for told me i was the biggest mistake of her life and she wanted nothing to do with me ever again. hearing those words come out of her mouth caused so much pain. it neary killed me. i turned to my EP friend for support, she told me that my heart will heal, and everything will get better. at first i didnt it was possible. by november my divorce was finalised. i was mourning 2 relationships ending. December came and after a few weeks of crying myself to sleep and wondering if i made the right choice, my brother decided it was time for me to rejoin the dating scene, i told him im not ready he said i need to make new friends and socialise, so i tried and to my amazement i felt something other than pain and sadness.

i slept with a girl who i hardly knew and then i realised that i could never be with a man again. and i would never live a lie again.
in January 2012, my parents found out i'm gay. they did not handle it well, my mom prayed everynight for me to be straight again.

I was living the party life, not commiting to anyone, having fun. i made that choice because i didnt want to get hurt again. i told myself i would never fall in love ever again.

well it my words didnt even get a chance to get cold. now here is where it gets interesting. i had a meeting with a client, who as fate had decided had to be the best friend of the woman who caused me so much heartache. on this day in february 2011 i found out that the ex-woman had told so much lies about me. that hurt a lot. so me and lets call her my guardian angel, started chatting everyday. for the first time in 6 months i smiled in my heart and soul. my friendship with my angel grew stronger. in a matter of 3 weeks i knew was falling in love with her. the problem? she is married and "straight". and i thought she didnt like me that way.

on 20 march 2011, she invited me for a picnic, i thought is was just normal picnic. to my surprise she had gone all out, planned every little detail :-). Champagne, treats, very romantic setting, and for a moment i thought she wanted me too, i was so nervous, it was a perfect afternoon and i had to fight every urge in me to not kiss her. and suddenly before i could blink she kissed me, i was so shocked i think messed up the kiss, yet we kissed for about 10 min non-stop. in that moment i knew i wanted to be with her.

so we met each other everyday after work, for an amazing kissing moment, sharing heart to heart talks. and then talk over the phone the rest of the time we couldnt be together. in april 2011, we made love for the first time. it was heaven. i have that special moment locked away in my heart. i will never forget it.

we have been together for 10 months and live happily together, she is my soulmate, my one and only, my always and forever. we still have a long way to go, yet i am positive and look forward to building a future with her by my side.

so my EP friends, i hope this story inspires everyone to follow your heart and find the happiness that you all deserve. best of luck and i am here to help with words of encouragement and support. i hope i can give back to this group that has given me so much love,support,friendship and understanding.

:-)
tcs0430 tcs0430
22-25, F
1 Response Jan 23, 2013

this is amazing. thank you. I continually fall for women who are 'straight'. I have an EP friend I was telling it to and i think its because I long for the 'surprise' that you just described. I was having kind of a bad moment just now and wandered on here just for the support I need from this place.

you brightened my evening. thank you. :)