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How Can You Be A Mom, And A Lesbian?

That's what people are always asking me. Wheu.

I used to explain it without hesitation. I'd say: "Well, you see, I knew I was missing something... I didn't really understand myself when I was young and popping out a baby. I always fantasized about women, I knew I liked them. I knew I couldn't stop feeling like I wanted one when I was with a guy... and while I fantasized about women, I also fantasized about motherhood... and I have always been very free spirited. I got caught up in living in the moment. I didn't know myself well enough to know that I shouldn't have been beating myself up trying to be with a man, and I shouldn't have been trying to have babies. Alas, here I stand... Gay, and a Mother."

But after you explain this, as if you should EVEN HAVE TO... so many times; You will find that people don't understand how this can happen.

"You're not gay, then." They may say.
or...

"So, you're Bi?"

...no.

Just a single, lesbian mother who is writing in an experience project forum because sometimes people just don't understand.


ALSO:
Who else feels like lesbians (specifically) are less inclined to date a girl because she has kids? What's up with that?
thehonorablesushi thehonorablesushi 22-25, F 9 Responses Oct 12, 2011

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though i have never been asked why i have a child yet am lesbian... that's because not 1 from my family circle and friends know i am a lesbian mom... but yeah... i guess they'll never understand anyway... my partner now also can't seem to understand... which saddens me.

I understant that 100%. i have a beautiful daughter and i am a lesbian. i was married once but now i understand why that couldnt happen i wasnt good in being with guys always fighting always getting hurt....i know people dont understand that and it hurts that even my mother doesnt accept me for who i am and that she has tought of taking my daughter away from me.

I have felt and experienced that about girls who lose their motivation to try to date me cuz i have a kid and i even knew i they liked me :( until i said i have a kiddo. :s

I have felt and experienced that about girls who lose their motivation to try to date me cuz i have a kid and i even knew i they liked me :( until i said i have a kiddo. :s

I have felt and experienced that about girls who lose their motivation to try to date me cuz i have a kid and i even knew i they liked me :( until i said i have a kiddo. :s

I have felt and experienced that about girls who lose their motivation to try to date me cuz i have a kid and i even knew i they liked me :( until i said i have a kiddo. :s

I have felt and experienced that about girls who lose their motivation to try to date me cuz i have a kid and i even knew i they liked me :( until i said i have a kiddo. :s

I hear those type questions all the time and I simply say "I am who I am,if you cannot accept that,then those are your issues" Dont feel you have to explain yourself to anyone.<br />
And I agree the right one will come along. If it helps at all...I have 7 children and found a loving partner.

you have to be true to yourself and screw everyone else. if what you want what you desire is to be with another woman who has/wants kids, then go for it! trust me, there are women out there who are in the same situation your feeling and are just too shy to admit it. stay the course and one day the right person will come along for you. Smiles...