The Big Scary Lesbian

I came out at 16, I think. It may have been 17. Not that it really matters in the long run. I came out to my mom, step dad and my real dad. My mom stood there scowling, and said that she had a feeling. My step dad thought that it meant I was molesting his daughters. And my dad was just like, 'okay, I love you anyway.'

Mom was not happy that I came out to her. In fact she's still mad that I'm 'a gay' as she puts it. She doesn't get it and doesn't want to. All she understands in her mind is that it isn't what she wanted. And since it's something she can't control it angers her.

My step dad accused me of doing very bad things to my step sisters. For some reason he thought that me being a lesbian must mean that I am also a rapist. It's like he hated me to begin with but didn't know why. And then, eureka! He figured it out, it's because I was gay. So all his pent up anger and aggression had a new outlet, me.

Dad was cool. He would probably be okay with me even if I brought home a goat. He has always adored me because I was his little girl. However, he did not have custody and was mostly absentee as a father.

I grew up and have since been in one very very serious long term relationship and a couple of prior ones that didn't mean anything. I'm 25 now and I've loved and been loved by women.

I'm not a flaming lesbian. I often get the 'really, your gay?' comment. It's like people expect it to be stamped on out for heads or something. While I'm very much gay I've never felt the need to wrap myself in all the banners and symbols of the community. But then I've never been one to indulge in the community very often. My age bracket among the lesbians and location seem to party a little to hard for my taste. I'm afraid I don't live for the party. I'd rather be in the gym or exploring academia than getting drunk or high. I've been called old before my time because of my reluctance to get my party on.

It's awesome to have grown up and come out when I did, because I can really see how the world is changing. Gays in the military and before long we will have equal rights all across the country. It does my heart good to know that those that come after me will have even more rights than me. (Hopefully)
LeighM58 LeighM58
22-25, F
7 Responses Mar 14, 2012

Thank u

Also THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A TYPICAL LESBIAN!! That's like saying there is such thing as a typical human.... everyone is different in their own way and should be proud of who they are no matter what sexual orientation, shape, age, race, gender etc they are!

Well well, human mostly prejudices, and sort types of people in categories. So i think, there ARE typical lesbians, 'the Stereotype ones' not meaning that i disagree with your opinion ;)

{My step dad thought that it meant I was molesting his daughters.} <br />
Some people can just be so ignorant! <br />
My mother said a bunch of hurtful things and we didn't speak for a few months but she came around and told me she loves me no matter what.. for the most part they always come around... If they don't just makes them horrible people for not understanding/ accepting family as you are! ;)

I find it funny because you're different from the typical lesbo, because everyone keeps saying that they don't believe me when i say I'm gay. My gay guy best friend said I'm too smart to be gay (I still don't get it) -__- I like how you're different from the norm cause where I live there are only ghetto butch lesbians.

It's unfortunate that where you live there isn't much of a variety. Lesbians come in all shapes, sizes, personalities and social backgrounds. My particular style is not the one that is commonly scene on TV or movies. However, we do exist. I'm afraid I also don't get the remake 'too smart to be gay'. I wasn't aware intelligence had anything to do with it, lol. It's more just refusing to be anything other than who I am. I'm not a ghetto butch, so I'm not going to try to be. I'm just me.

Yeah I guess it's just that the ones that are smart stay in the closet. For me I'm not allout about it. It's my business :)

I just go by a simple policy. I don't deny who or what I am. But that doesn't mean i'm going to volunteer information. If asked, I will tell the truth. I don't really think of it as being in the closet, I'm not hiding anything. I have just never felt the need or drive to be in-your-face with my sexuality. Besides, I don't really want to know about my co-workers sex life. I just consider it to be extending the same courtesy. At the end of the day, it's no one's business.

I get the same comments from peiople when they find out that I am a lesbian. A lot of times guys will say' "What a waste." Its ok to be hot (pretty) and very femme (girly) and still love the company of other women.

My favorite is the 'you just need the right man to straighten you out'. That's so ridiculous. I mean seriously, I'm not stupid I know exactly what straight people do in bed. If I wanted that, I would have it. It's really simple.


That really inspires me to tell my parents but they are very judgemental and I'm still very scared? Any advice!

If they are super judgmental, like really bad. And you still are dependent on them for shelter and such. Then I'd say wait. There's nothing cool or awesome about being kicked out because your parents can't deal. But that's just from my own experience. I know for a fact there are those out there that will say, sure tell them, screw what they think. But I'm not a screw the consequences kind of person. I personally don't have much family left because of my sexuality and I lost friends when I first came out. And it sucks, but that's the world we still live in.

Yeah I'm ready for the losing the friends part cause mine are super judgmental but you love who you love right?