Falling For A Straight Girl.....

There's no story as such... I'm a lesbian and proud to be one... The fact that I am a lesbian never really bothered me, atleast not romantically. I was attracted to girls and that was it.
That is ofcourse until recently... Until I fell in love with a girl... Deeply, madly, insanely in love with a... STRAIGHT girl... :(
To top it off, she has a boyfriend...
I just wanted to share how painful it is to watch the love of your life be with someone else... And feel so helpless..
I can't even tell her how much I love her... Or I risk losing her as a friend..
I don't know what to do.. I'm in sooooooo much pain.. :(
Has this happened to anyone before?? How did you get through it??
sri1990 sri1990
22-25, F
26 Responses Apr 9, 2012

Im in the same situation, and i know it really hurts... its the first time i love someone this way and the first time i know for sure i like girls, i love the girl sooo much, we are good friends, and she has a boyfriend too. I just want to hug her all the time, to kiss her but its not possible, i was suffering a lot for months and i decided to tell her, i felt so much better, it was weird, i sent her a message and she was so nice, she understands me well and said nothing will change, so here's my advice: DONT BE AFRAID TO TELL HER WHEN YOU ARE IN LOVE, if she is your friend she will understand and you will feel better. We are still good friends and spending time together, but still it hurts because i want more than that.

I see how this is hard on a lesbian but in this case I'm the straight girl with the boyfriend but tonight not to long ago we kissed because it was her goal. But I don't want to hurt her and tell her that I didnt feel a click. What do i do?!

I'm in the same situation as you . I can feel u :( it's killing me

i have the same exact problem. i came out to her and told her how i felt and she thought i was kidding so I don't feel like confessing anytime soon. I'm planning on leaving notes in her locker confessing my love for her but i'm going to sign it as secrect admirer. wish me luck

ME TOO...help. I am a Lesbian, totally in love with a straight women. To make the situation worse, currently in a long term lesbian relationship. Any one got any suggestions or thoughts.

Do you think she has feelings for you aswell? I am the straight person, head over heals for a lesbian. I wish she told me she likes me. We have a thing, we are not really friends, acquantnces but everytime we see each other the room lights up, but still I wish she made the first move because I am just afraid its just ne making all this things up 😒

and besides you are already in a relationship with a woman, I tought woman to woman is a happy ending, guess all relationships have its up and downs. I think I would be extremely happy with my woman, and i would be crushed to know she is longing for someone else 😒

I have a experience, about three days ago, I went to track and field tournament at Arkansas. Accidentally, I met a girl named Eliza Linstaedt, she is lesbian of my friend Isabelle Diaz. I knew her Isabelle in same school. Well, Eliza have girlfriend is Isabella, but I love Eliza soooo much! Also, I couldn't stop thinking of her. She is so athlete, she is Minnesota person, and she had extremely red and maroon hair! Eliza and I started to be close friend. But still I love her so much! What I should do? Please help me!

I too am in a similar situation. I have a strong crush on someone I work with. Sadly she is married with kids.

Everyday it's as if I'm losing a little piece of my heart. Sometimes I don't even feel like a whole person.

Yep i'm in the same situation as you. whats worse is shes my best friend and her boyfriend is a friend of mine....(Shes straight)although i confessed to her and she full out rejected me.

I'm going through the same thing right now so I can relate

I have the same problem. Last year on August 18, I met an amazing girl. Her and I were an instant click, and became close friends very quickly. At the time, she was bi. Fast forward to this recent August, and we're still extremely close. Talking every day. Until some dude developed a crush on her. At that point I learned she is now straight and not looking for love. My heart was crushed. I still haven't told her how I truly love her (Considering we tell each other "I love you" every day since we're like sisters.)

Hi...I'm going through the same thing with this girl Im close to its hard cause she knows I like her and she likes me back but there's a boy that likes her and I get jealouse when they are together and to make it worse she kissed this guy and then told me as if I wouldn't care but I do and it hurts me please help I dont know what to do!

I have the exact same problem.
I'm really close with a girl, though we both have admitted we are bisexuals and may tease each other, often flirt and all I'm not sure if she thinks of me that way too, I'm really dying to tell her I love you but I'm afraid that later she will feel uncomfortable... I don't really know what to do even if I give her signs, like she knows how jealous I am when she's hanging out with a senior of us, girl as well, or anyway whenever she is with someone else... but that senior UGH I don't know they are hanging out often... not as often as we do but...
I do have a gay friend to help me but... I don't really know, I'll need opinions before acting.

Hi . i am going through the same ****. My girl already know that i love her crazily . I have told her " I LOVE YOU" probably 2100 times and she have said i love you may be 100 times but with full feeling. she takes care of me, she loves when i am happy.Gets upset if i am fighting with others and likes me a lot and love the way i pamper her . She is my junior at work so i am always around her. We also had some close and intimate moments . Having said that she likes guys and has crush on my senior.They often meet out but she always seek permission from me and i cannot say no to her.She had a boyfriend but becoz of me she broke up with her and she told me that she is falling for me.
Still she never commits the relationship and never ever explain her feelings, that keeps me confusing all the time. because of that i do fight with her and we cry and switch off our phones for 10 mins but I love her soo much that i some how convince her.. My story is still ongoing and her parents will be taking her some place soon so that she can meet a guy for arrange-marriage .
so i will keep you all posted.... :-)

This is happening right now minus her involvement with a boyfriend. And I'm not a les. Just explorative.

Yes. Its happening to me right now. But the difference is that she knows I love her that way...

I'm a straight guy but my feelings and story ain't a part from yours. I have feeling for my friend and she is unfortunately a lesbian. I fell in love with her even knowing that she is a lesbian and she told me that things before our friendship began. Now she is with someone else and she is kinda happie girl all the time. I couldn't do anything coz, on one side I have got immense love for her and in the other side, fear to lose her. To get out of this I have been so many website and books, looking for some possible to make her mine but couldn't find anything. Finally, I found one thing that is, if u want her in your life just b nice and happie around her. And waiting for hope...:( coz, I couldn't turn as a gay and neither she could b straight...:( only hope for miracle to happen..:)

Hi, im a lesbian who has fell in love with a straight girl, funly enough she thinks we're just friends so I wrote her a song to share my love of her and gave it to her. She looked at me, started crying, scrumpled it up and threw it in the bin and I havent seen her since...

I always fall in love with older women who are married and have authority power over me. Like teachers and therapists. I am still trying to figure out why i was like that for so long. I still don't understand why at all.

I did this. I went the whole way. Had a relationship with a straight friend for 18 months. She has told me over and over that she will never ever come out, because of her kids. I can't promise her nothing bad will come as a result of coming out; I can't lie like that, even if things are better for most people now.
End result? We keep breaking up. This time for good, I think. We're all split up even though we love each other, are open with each other, have excellent communication, fantastic sex, laughs, respect, etc. I get on really well with the kids.
Could have easily been a happily-ever-after but she won't come out. I could deduce that the 'love' was/is all BS, but it isn't. It's way sadder than that. It's real, it just isn't enough.

Women throughout the centuries have been really good at suppressing their desires. So yeah, even if you end up with your straight girl, you'll never have her unless she's willing to stop being a 'straight girl'. I wouldn't bother if I were you; find a girl who is out and proud, and who will hold your hand, stand by your side and build a life with you.

I have done things just to be with a girl it was worth it she has been my gf for a year now I'm bi so it might not work for you but if she straight you might get her to go bi so how much do you love her I myself feel if you love some one and they love you then both can have and do what they wish sex is sex and love is love so ask yourself if you can handle her getting **** and being with you so I guess what I'm saying is if you can't handle making love to her while a guy has sex with her then just stay best freinds

Here is my story...I met a great friend of mine who I knew for 2 years before she admitted she was in love with me. She is lesbian...I am...me! I went thru 2 relationships with men with her by my side as a great friend, and she, silently loved me all along. Somethings are worth fighting for, worth waiting for. I am now happily with her andd have been for the past year and a half. Nothing is set in stone, love has no gender and no limitations, drop hints but never risk your friendship if you are unsure.

I am in the same situation right now... I'm in love with her, but I can't have her... the crazy part is that we're so close together... when she have no one I'm always there... we have the same subjects, so it's really hard to be around her. i think that she knows how i feel she just chooses to ignore it. :')

I know how you feel it's hard but I Can't promise it gets better and if you love her tell her if she doesn't except that then she doesn't deserve you

Maybe I can lighten some hope? I can't guarantee the outcome to be the same, every situation is different. I have a story called, "My Best Friend" and moving on can be very difficult. It may seem like you will never move on, that she is the only one for you. It was much easier for me to move on once she turned me down, I was relieved though that she knows now and she is so true a friend to me that we continued to be best friends. I managed to move on :) I am so grateful for her. Anyways. I hope the best for you

Well I am in the same situation for me this has been goin on for 21/2 yrs this girl started with me I didn't even know I had these feelings for a female I mean I have been attracted to women b4 but not like this thought crossed my mind but I NEVER wanted to act on thrm till now she flirted with me she told me she loves me we became really close we talk to each other on a daily basis we txt for hrs we do everything together she was @ me but I didn't respond when she was doing these things cause I wasn't sure if she was foreal or not cause throuhg all of this she claimed to be in love with some1 even though they didn't have much contact but this was her story I fell for her and her kids and I fell hard and still falling she has no idea how I feel for her so she stoped flirting with me and sayn different things to me my guess is cause I didn't respond to her when she wanted me to so now she is steady lookinf or a man to be with this kills me cause I wanna tell her sooooo bad and jus can't I sit back and watch her go from dude to dude lookn for 1 of em to love her the way that I want to I definately know what u are going through it hurts hurts like hell its like do u risj the friendship to let her know how u feel or do u keep the frienship and take the pain! Well like I said she hasn't flirted with me in months but I can still tell there is something btween us! I talk to her only when she talks to me I see her only when she wants to see me so with that being said it jus makes it easier for me to let her keep the contact goin than me pushing the issue of wanting to be with her cause me starting convos and seting up things to see her hurts when she dnt txtback or tells me no she cnt see me! Eventualy she will wonder y u are limiting the contact! If u wanna talk about this more u can inbox me!

The girl I'm trying to work things out with was... Well for all practical purposes considered straight before we got together. We were friends, she was my best friend actually, until I was sent to another town for work for a while, we talked more, her relationship with her kids's dad was failing, so we got together. Moved in together with 2 of her 4 kids, the younger 2 hated me for taking mommy from daddy in their minds, and still do. We were together 9 months, and still love each other, she just has this mindset that she has to be loyal to him. Most times, I have no problem waiting for her to return, as I believe fully that she will, but then there are the times when I see how the 2 of them still aren't working (yes she went back to him when we broke up) where I know I can and would treat her so much better. It's a matter of waiting or forgetting and moving on.

I don't really have much of an experience but I think I know how much pain you have to endure falling for the straight girl, I think that if you and her are close friends then you should tell her and trust that you wouldn't lose her, you might not get her but I believe it would be the first step in moving on, and if you ever want anyone to talk to I'd be delighted :)