Hopeless Romantic Lesbian

Why do people have to love ? even we all know that love can only makes us cry and feel terrible pain that only time can heal...

Even if I knew how much I love the person, and I knew to myself that I can able to give everything and anything to her, I can also make things I don't usually do, like making you cross oceans from manila to Tacloban, Leyte using plane just to see her on the first time after meeting her online after 5 months, finding her office in global city, Taguig without any idea where to start, cooked her a meal for her lunch after getting home on an evening shift and deliver it to her office from Eastwood to global city, putting an I love you sign in a freeway in front of paragon plaza in Mandaluyong and has red balloons all over the bridge saying I love you with her name on it .(Like a john lloyd and bea movie), surprising her a chocolate, throw pillow and flowers in her office table, finding yourself creating a mimic chicken pillow from a Korean drama "My Girlfriend is a Gumiho" that I knew she really loved, creating customized cards with her photo on it, throwing her a surprised birthday party, coming from manila to batangas twice or thrice a month and stay in their place for the whole weekends and cooked for her family, mother and siblings even shes not yet your girlfriend, I spend my birthday, Christmas and even new year with her that she didn't mind and did not give a damn because her reason is that, "I didn't asked you to." she sometimes intentionally humiliate and embarrassed me in front of her friends and etc...

Maybe some of you would never believe that someone can do this for someone they love, or some women would never believe that there's someone is willing to do this for you... all for the sake of love, for others it's insane, crazy and pathetic.. but for me being hopeless romatic I find it sweet and romantic. Thats my way how I show you how much I love you, Its my manifestation of love, those small or big things that I do... is the only way I knew how to show my feelings for someone I choose to love... I'll be so proud to shout in the universe how much I love this person that I chose to love, even I knew that at the end of the day, that she will only rejects me... because she can't love me the way I love her, because shes straight and all that... It hurts that after everything you do, when you asked her "Can you be my girlfriend?" or "Pwede ba maging tayo?" you will only hear from her "No and I'm Sorry", Yes It hurts like hell, Pero sabi nga nila na "Di ka naman nagmahal para lang maging masaya eh". :(

I'm not bragging the things that I've done for someone. Even if she doesn't like me and I know that there's no chance for us to be together, I wouldn't hesitate to do all the things under my power just to prove you what I felt is true and sincere.

Very frustrating isn't it? but what can I do, even if I love her so much, this much, and even how good is my heart. It's not enough for these people you love not too hurt you... Yes, you can be exhausted by the pain it brought you, but once you love the person, you'll never get tired of loving her.... of course you can be tired in everything that you do for her, and if you feel tired, you can pause for a while and do it again and again until you admit to yourself that you're fed up. At least I knew to myself that I gave my best, I took the shot and I knew I wouldn't regret everything what I've done for the one I really love, and at least I already answered my WHAT If's? by doing the WHY not?, they say that "nothing is really over unless you stop trying", it's true though. But sometimes we have to admit to ourselves that there are battles that you have to surrender and accept the fact that we can never have that person in our life no matter how much we want them to be.

If I show and exert my effort, spend my fortune and pushing myself to do extra miles only for one thing... for that only thing... to beloved by person I chose to love. From there, I can safely say that I did a good job. What can I do? as much as we cannot force that person to love me, I can't stop loving them.

And what's funny here is that? the fact that they broke my heart in a thousand tiny pieces... but each and every one of those pieces still loves them. (damn.....)

But even if I cried, hurt, and exhausted why do I still choose to love? It's because... it's the most wonderful feeling in the world and to love and beloved by the person we chose to love can complete us and I can safely say I / we can only be happy... :)
yuki24 yuki24
22-25, F
1 Response Sep 6, 2012

"Di ka naman nagmahal para lang maging masaya eh"...why does love has to f*ckn hurts??

because heart is the most vulnerable to people, love is the equalizer to people, there's no rich or poor, there's no intelligent or moron, there's no ugly or good looking in terms of love

minsan nga mas gusto pa natin masaktan physically kesa emotionally, kasi wounds from our skin can be healed by medicines, scars can be treated by modern cosmetic technology, but the pain in heart, cannot be treated by any medicine, wala pang nadidiskubreng gamot para dun.. sana nga meron na, sigurado ako mabenta yun lalo dito sa pinas hahaha.... the only cure in a broken heart is time and another love. :)

time takes a lot time so it heals slowly..and finding another love isnt easy to handle..i have scarred a lot physically but what hurts until now are the scars of my emotional hurts...

granted he/she gave you scars, but i that person did someting really nice, and the only person that made you felt that love.... admit it.... he/she is your favorite scar. :)

me tama kah!!ewan ko nga bah kung bakit sya pa..evn tho i kno she doesnt feel d same way stil i kept falling for her..damn love..anyway tnx for ur tym..take care..:)

but if you will remember your happy memories.... still you can say... that he is your favorite scar. :)

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