I'm In Love With Two Women.

I've always been afraid I wouldn't be able to love just one person. I just have so much love to give I want to be able to love more than one person. I've never had an open relationship. And I've never shared that I wanted to be in one with any of my girlfriends. 5 years ago I met the woman of my dreams. We've been together since then and lived together almost the entire time. She is my soulmate. Finaly I thought I had gotten rid of my feelings to love more than one person. Then I met someone else. I met her while out of town on a business trip. We had an instant connection. She is happily married to a man. I instantly loved everything about her. We became friends through text and email. A couple of weeks after we met she told me she couldn't stop thinking about me. My heart dropped. I didn't know she felt that way for me. That night we heavily flirted via texting(a little more than that but I don't want to be too descriptive). We kept on like this for several months. We talked all the time. We shared our thoughts and feelings and poetry. I feel like I've known her forever like before this lifetime and she feels the same way. We are kindred spirits. Then she decided we needed to back up since are both in commited relationships. So we kept talking all the time and did some light flirting but nothing else. We still tell each other "I love you" and call each other baby. It's been very confusing to me. Lately the flirting has gotten a little heavier. I confessed my feelings of wanting more. Of wanting to get closer to her. We can never have a physical relationship. We live to far apart and it just won't happen. She broke my heart. She said she just can't let herself get that close to me because of our relationship status. She just wants us to keep things light and flirty. I just can't do that. I'm trying to move forward and just be happy to have her as a friend but I can't flirt with her. I'm so sad.

Now I'm thinking maybe I just need to find someone else who will accept my love and know I can never have a physical relationship with them. I would never do that to my partner.

Any advice on what to do with my flirty friend or advice if I should find another person to receive my love?
nattyjo76 nattyjo76
36-40, F
2 Responses Nov 27, 2012

Lu Loving Two
I live an open lifestyle for two reasons. The relationships I had before never worked. It seems two people so in love somehow loose themselves and give up what that enjoy and sometimes never take space from each other and the relationship grows old, never how it started but it ends, I met my true love on-line and than around 6 months later I met her sister. We all began talking as well as my other friend and we all know each other and enjoy the open lifestyle. I don't want casual sex although I don't judge those who do. My heart is big and I never want to loose the love I have for these two wonderful women. We are all open with each other and honest about our feelings. I'm happier now than ever before and I never see our love growing stale or boring or lifeless. Partners seem to suffocate each other totally depending on each other for happiness, never to open their hearts to another, I for one, will love these two women for the rest of my life and we all will live together in harmony. An open lifestyle has no room for jealousy. It's about honesty, being yourself, accepting them for who they are as they do you. I hope this helps and I realize not all women believe in this lifestyle and I respect that and I hope you do the same. Lu

Leave her alone u have a women at home. Or break it off with ur partner. Tht is not far to ur other Hafe.