I Am a Lesbian
Earlier this year I decided to leave the town I have lived in for almost a decade because I finally discovered what I wanted to do with my life. In order to continue along that path I need to be elsewhere. It hurts terribly to leave this beautiful place but I need to move on. I know I can come back to visit. This was all very clear in my mind.
More than a few months ago (sometime in 2007), I had been advised by a very wise friend to write down what I am looking for in a life partner. This would help to clarify what I was looking for and to let the universe know what I desired. I followed this advice; I wrote a detailed page of attributes, characteristics and beliefs. I even added, in half-jest, that she was to have a Scottish accent.
Now fast forward to June of this year; my plan to move in the fall felt good. I was invited by a friend to try out a Yoga class at the nearby Yoga Centre and because I was feeling so good about myself, I went. I tried it and liked it more than I thought possible. I discovered Yoga! The Yoga Instructor was very good; I could tell she really cared about the people in her classes. She has a Scottish accent. It took a few weeks, but I remembered what I had written way back when and became confused.
From what I know of her, she has a great deal in common with the page describing my life-partner. She is very kind, has a very caring heart, is so beautiful inside and out and when she chooses to gently tease me, I can't do much except babble a bit, back up and quickly leave the room.
It would have been so easy to leave had I not met her. I don't know what she feels for me, whether she is even interested.
What I do know is that I trust her so very much just because she is who she is. This is very interesting as I do not trust easily and never in the way I seem to trust her. It comes naturally. I do know she is so very beautiful and I would consider myself exceedingly blessed if she were my life-partner. I do know I will miss her very much when I do leave in the New Year (after I have saved up enough money to move.)
I do know she has four teenage children (she is divorced) and one of her sons looks like her. My world stopped for a moment as I took in his features. It makes me happy that they are in the world simply because they are a part of her.
I do know that if something is meant to happen, it will.
Yes, I'm in serious like, if not love, with my Yoga Instructor... I even wrote a poem:
And
There, upon your
Shoulders
Hangs diaphanous quiet.
(You carry it with tenderness;
A subtle mantle.)
