Comming Out

Hey all, this is my story about being able to admit to being a lesbian, and the strugle with the real truth that I had hid for many years.

I have know that I was a lesbian since I was 14 or 15 (now 28) but I never wanted/could admit it to myself or others.  I tried to do the "normal & right" thing by either not being with anyone or being with a man.  Well I found a man that I did love and still to this day love, he is one of my best friends and we (however wierd it sounds) still live with eachother.  We have a two bedroom apt, and we do as we want.  I was missrable in the relationship both sexually and mentaly, that it had put me into a downward spril of some major depression and I became a major ***** not only to my ex but to everyone around me.  I knew that if I didn't do something about it, I would end up more than likely killin myself over it.  I never got into having sex with my ex or any man for that fact, I just wasn't sexually turned on by men.  I found them attractive, but didn't want the sex.  So I would try to go to bed before my ex would get home from work at night, just so I would have to have sex with him....he would almost force sex onto me, so I would just give in and screw him.  I new things needed to change and I was the only one that could change it.  So I did.

On to the comming out, I only told my close friends that I was bi-sexual in Oct of last year, and I had my first lesbian experiance in March of this year.  It was the most amazing experiance I had ever had.  The sex was so inteance and amazing, never felt like that when I was with men.  After that I was able to come out to all my friends and co-workers, but not the family.  I came out to my folks in April, they are comming to terms with it and as long as I'm happy they are happy.  I only have been with three women thus far, but have been with them on several occasions.  I went to my very first Gay Pride this year and had the time of my life.  I meet so many cool ppl and hot women, even hooked up with a fine woman, and we are still hookin it up on occasion.  I'm not ready to be involved with anyone on a serious note yet, I wanna have some fun and be single for a while, since I have just gotten out of over a 3 year relationship with a man.  I want to discover everything I can with women, before I settle down with ms. right.

I have never been happier than I am now.  I can go out and do what I want and with whom I want....Yes I am very slective on who I will sleep with, I don't go out whorin around.  I am D&D free and extreamly clean and well groomed woman, and expect the same from the one I hook up with.  All my friends and family can tell that I am so much more happy and easier to be around now.  I have changed my lifestyle but I'm still the same ol' wild and crazy person that I have always been.  A tiger can change his life without changing his stripes, and so can we.

I love women and I let everyone know it, I'm very proud of who I am and what I am, and no one can ruine that feeling.  I am a butch dyke...I have masculine features and dress masculine, and that is what makes me comfortable.  I like my women more on the butch side also....that is all.



crazycoolcat28 crazycoolcat28
26-30, F
39 Responses Sep 9, 2006

go for it

Check out my Lebian Ladies stories on my page! Like and heart for more(:

I love to hear this kind of joy & most of all a strong spirited woman like yourself. I came out of the closet when I was 13 I just knew it...I'm 23 now & somethings have changed. I had a beautiful healthy daughter in feb & married the father of my baby; but time after time I catch myself missing a womans touch....

Good for you(: Im in my early 20's and i came out when i was 14/15. It wasn't easy at all for my family until i met the right girl 2 years and 3 months ago. My family loves me no matter what and have excepted the person i am. I am engaged and i cannot wait to marry her and have a family.

The journey you'll take will be both amazing and heartbreaking. Just be you, and do what makes you happy.
I wish the best for you(:

I had the same thing, i've been with men but didn't want the sex. I am currently in a loving relationship with a woman whom i love very much, i'm kinda new to the dating woman thing since i never really had a true gf but i think i'm getting the hang of it.

Hi, I am new her and just posted my story, also coming out. I am Maryzr1, please read it, if you do not mind. I read your story and find it so interesting. Your amazing.

Thank you for sharing your story! Right up to the part where you started coming out I felt like I was reading my own story. I'm not yet @ a point in my life where I'm ready to come out. But I always find it inspiring & encouraging to read about other womens' journeys.

having sex is good but not enough.when you become older you will sense a lack of one wants to have sex with you or maybe you yourself get tired of sex.i don't like lesbos but i prefer a lesbian couple to a sex seeking lesbian.

No offense but wouldn't it have been esier to just tell your ex you didn't want to have sex

Sometimes we get wrapped up in complicated relationships. Finding a way out isnt always as easy as it may seem.

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Good for you, your second para. reminds me of my situations, it's almost exactly a like. Thank you for posting this, i feel like i'm not the only one. :)


I wish i could too.. good on you! :)

that's a great story, I think I'm kind of in your first paragraph at the moment with avoiding being in any relationship, feeling depressed and not being able to admit it to myself but reading this gives me the hope that I can get to where you are now! thanks!! :)

I had a best friend( female) at first she dress as a woman. Until the day she confessed to me that everything changed. She doesn't want me to her friend but to be her lover.At first I couldn't accept it to my self .Our friendship continued.One day we drink,something unexpected happened.The relationship continued for several years until we separated. I still miss her.Good luck to you and hope you can find somebody who will love you and stay by your side come what may...

So AWESOME!!!! hehe d__b

The truth brings enlightnment and joy for the one who shares their truth.

It's Awesome you came out. Congratulations! Wishing you a gay happy life :D

Comgratulations! =)

Congrats :)

im proud of you too ! :D

It sounds like your coming went well. I was with my best friend who was a man aswell, i was with him for 6 and a half years years and i still love him. Although things went extremely bad when i told him. And now we arent talking anymore. I didn't understand why people thought sex was so great either until i met my girlfriend. The thing is though my ex wouldn't touch me at all unless i had sex with him. He wouldn't hold my hand or cuddle during a movie. It was so hard to tell him too. Even though he tells me he knew i was a lesbian since he met me when i was 15. How did you things go when you told your ex?

well i am 14 and a lesbian but its so hard for me at school and with parents it sucks not being myself at home. any advice???

your story is a lot like mine! and it has a happy ending. Im hopn for the same!


I have just told my male partner of over a decade that I think I want to be with a girl again....he is devastated, hurt and confused about the future. I love him very much but the sex has never been satisfying and it had reached a point where I no longer felt I could go there and so I started to withdraw on an emotional the end I could see I was causing even more damage by doing this. <br />
He is a wonderful man and I feel awful for putting him in this position but not acknowledging my true self was eating me up.<br />
In some ways things have gotten easier since I told him but there is also a lot of worry about what the future will hold. Plus having to deal with knowing it was me that caused all the heartache :-(( but if one good thing has come out of it....finally I feel free. I hope that one day I can once again experience the joy of being with another heart is aching for it.

How have things turned out? I am just beginning this journey after 10 years of marriage.

i love what you said on the last paragraph...........

hey mi name is chantel and im 14...i currently have a gf...ive never had sex in mi life bt wen i think bout wit a guy i think gross wen i think bout it wit a gurl i want it...does dis mean im a lesbian?

im proud of you ( :

Thank you for sharing. I totally feel you. It is stories like yours that make me know I am making the right decision for me.

that's inspirational, as long as you are happy , that's matters. and if you are happy u will bring hapiness to other people, isn't great?

that's inspirational, as long as you are happy , that's matters. and if you are happy u will bring hapiness to other people, isn't great?

This is the first story I read since joining. I am 36 years old and know exactly where you are coming from.

Congratulations! :)<br />
I've been out since I was 14... and it forever changed my life and my path... It was one of the most prominent moments in my life and I'm glad you talk about your coming out because sometimes I forget to stop and look at all the good things that have happened because I came out.<br />
Good luck to you and I do hope you have a beautiful, fulfilling life... filled with many happy days and memories. :)

I'm struggleling with this, I mean how do you know when u r a lesbian? I fond myself fantazising about them, and once I developed a crush on this girl that almost turned into a disaster! How can I know? any advice?

Dont worry about labeling yourself. Seriously. If you like them both be cool with it. If you find one person that you like thats of either gender be happy you found love with them. It's only as complicated as we allow it to be ( said as a person who REALLY over complicates this part of my life)

Love this advice. Sometimes we are forcing ourselves to identify with a certain group of people, just so that we feel like we belong somewhere, so that we don't feel different. And the truth is we will always be different- so what. Straight, lesbian or bi, butch or femme- who cares....Let's just be happy :).

Well I guess you know if you develop a crush on girls more than once. If you develop very strong feelings towards your best girlfriends or of you find the female body fascinating. It's a process that takes time I guess- it took me long time to admit that I am attracted to women ( I don't like the labelling word "llesbian" ). Don't hurry with the conclusions- just allow yourself to feel what you feel. The rest will follow itself.

well said, I really need to try and follow your advice and stop trying to put myself in a box...its tough though!

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Glad to hear you are Dungeons & Dragons free. ;)

so thats what the D&amp;D stands for. =)

inspirational... good luck! i hope u r very happy =]

Good luck with the rest of your life!