I Like Both At Different Times

I grew up gay but as I got older I realized it was easier to just be straight. I suppressed my gay desires for so many years that now I feel like that all I want to do is act on it. I never was interested in males really I just conformed for being normal. I was trying to be heavily religious so that encouraged me to be straight too. Now I feel like I like both. I am in a committed relationship and I would really love to have my family and have a girlfriend also. I feel like I am jealous of both men and women. I am jealous of men because they have a penis and that they have me. I wish I had a girl like me. Someone open, caring and giving. I'm frustrated in my homosexual area, because I am a lipstick lesbian type. The women I am attracted to are usually straight and the women who are attracted to me are masculine or not very attractive. I am not ugly. I am actually cute, trim, brown. I have nice looking guys who want me, I just don't have nice looking females who are attracted to me. Sometimes I think I should have just been born a male, but i like being a woman. I love dressing and doing my hair, but I'm attracted to the power men have. I guess in a past life I was a male hair dresser, designer and family man who was straight with a Halle berry, Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Biel, Alyssa Milano kind of wife and girlfriends on the side. LOL
Ricole123 Ricole123
22-25, F
May 5, 2012